Lugal

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

This app is a cesspit but I open it to shout into the void and update multiple people at once but, tldr;

SSRI's doubled, not doing so hot.

Been told my eye condition could lead to a permanent loss of vision in future, not guaranteed but yeah.

So that's how things are going.

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

Six weeks later. Rank 2 locked with leagues 200m all.

I'm not even the best at being unemployed and depressed, that's crazy.

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

Coming out of Twitter retirement to post my rank 1 OSRS Leagues get.

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

The constant daily reminders of the fact we only get 1 go around, and I've spent my time too mentally ill to even form bonds with family and friends, and will wake up tomorrow in the same clothes I wore all week, sit at my desk, rot for 16 hours in silence, and repeat until I go.

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

The mental is deteriorating rapidly, and it's insane that the 280 character limit of Twitter is still somehow my best outlet in a world where I can't get MH appointments or therapy.

I haven't been out since March, I haven't even spoken to my closest friends in months.

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

The sad reality is I'm just kind of over the whole being here thing, I literally can't mentally function in a way that allows me to improve my situation.

So BEST CASE scenario is things stays the same, which sucks in itself, but that's jut not how it works.

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

I hope none of you have to sit down and explain to a parent that you don't particularly want to be here anymore. That sucked. That REALLY sucked.

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

Too mentally ill to fix my dog shit life, not mentally ill enough to think it's dog shit because of trans people or immigrants.

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

Not saying people putting flags up and painting their houses is a good thing, but frankly I might have to get involved just to drive down house prices in my local area low enough in the hopes of owning one.

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

@pineapplexjelly Can't believe I'm checking to see if I can put thirst traps on the Klarna.

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

Every day is a fresh start, but more so in much in the same way that Prometheus was provided a daily fresh start.

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

My phone: "noticed you've been tweeting about sewerslide lately, that sucks. Anyway, heres a reminder that 4 years you moved into a huge detached house with forest views with all that money you made with your successful business before your complete mental breakdown"

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

Once again waking up to what feels like shards of glass in my eyes, light aversion, significantly impacted vision, and a heaped serving of that patented Lugal enthusiasm about being alive just enough to experience this.

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

@pineapplexjelly #NewLockScreen

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

@pineapplexjelly This might be fixing my mental health.

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

Trying to explain to my MH nurse that, I don't really want to be here but that leaving would be unfair to people that invested time and energy into me so we stick around for now, only for her to leave and come back with a 2nd person tells me I answered that incorrectly.

[Lugal @MFBA_Sam]

Waking up every day to the sensation of shards of glass in my eyes and blurry vision is actually just really fun, I definitely enjoy being here and am enthusiastic about the idea of remaining here.