Michael Thorton

Alcorn State University Class of 96’. Hammer Nvidia. Go Cards. Fuck the Cubs. 13.7 Handicap(sandbagging).

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

Jonathan Quick vs James Reimer tonight. Can't wait to not watch that one!

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

Steven Stamkos still scoring goals in the big 26' #whatthefuck

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

And the St. Louis Blues select Gavin Mcnigga 1st overall in the 2026 NHL draft. Thank you to the 2024-2025 Winnipeg Jets for ruining the entire Blues franchise for the next 10 years. Fuck you Pavel Buchnevich. #hitler #rapethestlouisblues

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

Just in: Stuart Skinner spotted getting shipped out of Tel Aviv on Israel Force One. Set to land in DC in 11 hours to meet with Netanyahu and Trump. #mossadagent #rapestuartskinner #mcdavo

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

@walkdownmikey more accomplished career as an individual or as an av?

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

hard R sundays are the best #racismisgoated

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

[clears throat]

(starting from the left)

wouldn’t, would, would, would, would, wouldn’t, wouldn’t, would

thank you luzz

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

Florida state is a sick school but man… not today. #prayersup

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

Rizzler in 12 years: Yeah so I used to do the rizz face and shit, idk if you’ve seen that before.

[Jordan Cripp @jordancripp]

Upside down text hats are the worst thing oat. Appalling to ruin the much respected rope hat.

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

@wobblymami Why are you fat?

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

Ugh. Is Kai Trump 18 yet? #umiami #golf

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

@barstoolsports This kid is either going to kill himself at the age of 11 or become a generational athlete.

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

Brady Tkachuk just went to the locker room. Matthew Tkachuk is not playing due to injury. Justin Trudeau working his Taylor Swift black magic. #fuckcanada

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

If you have a hat on and the letters are upside down. Kill yourself!

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

I’ll take a vodka tito’s on the rocks please.

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

Just lost to the Jewish Fraternity in the frat hockey league. The African sled hockey team would beat them.

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

How was your night? “It was good. Nothing too crazy.“

[Joseph “Likka” Ho @JosephLikkaHo]

Me and the roommates all got play last night and only one was ugly! #someonesgottadoit #takingonefortheteam

[Michael Thorton @michaelbthorton]

It’s 1pm. Buddy is sound asleep. He got “terrible sleep” because he was knee deep in tits last night. Really rough life. Selfish Douche.