We are in the 1990’s.
You’re a pub kid from the estate.
You’ve been dragged along so Dad can have “just the couple” before the game
(which is never just a couple).
Mum said, “Keep an eye on ’em.”
So now you’re part of the pub furniture.
You’re not on pints.
You’re on a pint glass of Coke that’s 90% ice.
Orange juice if they’re feeling flush.
Or a glass bottle of Panda Pop if the bar’s got some in.
You’re allowed near the pool table,
but only to “mind the cues”
and definitely not to touch the felt with sticky hands.
You build towers out of beer mats.
Little estates of your own.
Tower blocks.
Flats.
Entire communities that won’t make it past closing time.
There’s always snacks.
Scampi Fries.
Cheese & Onion crisps in blue packets.
Dry roasted nuts that make you cough but you pretend you like.
You drift about.
In and out of conversations.
Through clouds of smoke so thick you could chew it.
You start collecting empty glasses.
Two at a time if you’re feeling strong.
The bar staff call you “treacle” or “love”
and slide you a packet of crisps for your hard work.
The pub smells like stale lager, Embassy cigarettes, and someone’s overpowering aftershave they got for Christmas.
Big green ashtrays on every table.
All overflowing like tiny volcanoes.
The fruit machine is your PlayStation.
You stare at the lights.
The symbols.
The sounds.
Certain if you watch long enough, you’ll crack the code and become rich.
You get the shout from your Dad, ‘we’re going’.
On the way to the ground you have your starting 11 in mind.
On arriving the Dads get some beers in and tell you to bugger off to the seats/area or you begin to play football in the concourse with paper, plastic cups or other just to have a kick around.
The game goes by, win, lose or draw you have lost your voice from shouting, singing, calling the ref a wanker. You make your way back to the pub with the Dads and their sons. After a while you’re left with your Dad while the rest of the kids go home.
The dads are roaring.
Proper belly laughs.
Arguing about football like it’s politics.
Talking absolute nonsense with full confidence.
You hear words you’re not allowed to say.
Stories you’re not meant to know.
You don’t get all of it —
but you get the rhythm of it.
The warmth in it.
No one asks who you belong to.
They already know.
You’re our kid.
You get slipped a quid for crisps.
50p for the machine (that you’re not allowed to use… but do anyway).
Some old fella does a coin-behind-your-ear trick
while his cigarette ash hangs on for dear life.
It gets late.
Your eyes go heavy.
You curl up in the booth under Dad’s coat.
Sticky table.
Warm jacket.
Muffled laughter around you.
And everyone respects it.
They still shout across the pub like they’re hailing a bus,
but near you, voices drop.
Footsteps soften.
No one moves you.
No one complains.
You’re safe.
You’re known.
You belong to the room, and the room belongs to you.
And for a kid from the estate in 1990’s —
Life’s proper good
Happy Birthday to Dr. John Cooper Clarke!
Today we raise a glass to the Bard of Salford himself — Dr. John Cooper Clarke, the original punk poet, the sharpest tongue in the North, and a man whose words have shaped generations.
🚨ICYMI: How a food bank siphoned £195,000 into private hands
The Post can also reveal the Serious Fraud Office is investigating Knowsley Foodbank 👇
https://t.co/yVxouHMhPy
My mate just made a great point. It’s the late Gary Ablett’s birthday
Liverpool is full of brilliant murals of great sporting servants of the city. I’m not sure if there’s already one for Gary but there should be
The only man to win the FA cup at Liverpool & Everton
🔴🔵 🏆
Take your time to watch this. Honest as the day's long. Sad thing is, he'll probably get some kind of charge thrown his way
Fantastic to have him at our club 👍🏻🔵⚪️
#UHTPodcast#EFC#COYB#Everton
Proud to join the Independent Alliance, now a bigger group in Parliament than Reform.
From fighting the two-child benefit cap, cuts to winter fuel & disability benefits, to opposing Labour’s genocide in Gaza, we will stand up against injustice.
Join us: https://t.co/g0Ua1vOsEI