Mike Townsend

Bournemouth raised. Dubai resident. HR. Golf. Cricket. Views are my own.

[Harry Eccles @Heccles94]

Is the world really going to have to burn because the USA can't impeach a president?

[Isaac Saul @Ike_Saul]

Nonsense.

1. NYC doesn't have voter ID laws

2. In New York, the state, multiple parties can endorse the same candidate, so some can appear multiple times. Sliwa, the Republican, is also listed twice!

3. Eric Adams is on the ballot because he dropped out too late

4. Cuomo lost the primary, and ran as an indy, and ballots list major party candidates first

Maybe you don't like the rules. Fine. But posting this stuff on X with zero context makes people think there is fraud or cheating. These are just the rules being applied to candidates evenly.

[Mike Townsend @mikeoftownsend]

@ohwowthejet might just be the second best golfer on @bobdoessports 👀 #InternetInvitational

[Masters Burner @ANGC_burner]

The player order Keegan Bradley should send out tomorrow:

1. LeBron James
2. A huge fucking lobster with no rubber bands.
3. Timmy Chalamet
4. Scottie
5. Pete Buttigieg
6. Gavin Newsom
7. An actual Bear
8. Spieth
9. Lady J
10. A really hot bow of pho
11. Cam Tringale
12. Grant Horvat

[Mike Townsend @mikeoftownsend]

@RobbyBerger Eric Decker

[Mike Townsend @mikeoftownsend]

@NoContextBrits Dying. You?

[Mike Townsend @mikeoftownsend]

@TalkBournemouth

[Mike Townsend @mikeoftownsend]

Mental. #TheMasters2025

[Shane Bacon @shanebacon]

Patrick Reed one-hopping a ball in for eagle on 17 in the second-to-last pairing is about the 43rd most insane thing to happen on this second nine if that tells you how all of this has gone.

[Miscounted Cash Flow @Miscountedcf]

The bartender at the microbrewery showing me the 100 ipas they serve right before I ask for a Guinness

[Mike Townsend @mikeoftownsend]

@British_Airways You are directing customer to contact you, when I ring they say everyone’s busy and try to call later. I don’t want to refund my whole journey just the leg this morning. When LHR was closed I bought a flight to GVA from LGW instead. I want to keep my return.

[Mike Townsend @mikeoftownsend]

@mehul31dec @cricket_badger Because of a global pandemic and the delta variant making India unsafe - somewhat extenuating circumstances! Clearly India don’t have a problem playing in the UAE, having lived there for 8 years, the country’s population is over 50% Indian.

[Paul Montgomery @paulmont86]

Canny imagine how Luke Littler’s parents feel. The pride of seeing your 17 year old son become world champion. I nearly burst out crying when my 17 year old emptied the fuckin dishwasher without being asked.

[Mike Townsend @mikeoftownsend]

This ended me 🤣

[The72 - We Love the #EFL @_The72]

Just been battered 5-0 and you’ve got to present a shirt to a random woman (who is absolutely buzzing) because she called it pre game. Adam Armstrong’s head must be on Mars 🤣

[Mike Townsend @mikeoftownsend]

@MattFitz94 @PGATOUR

[Benny James @Beno_ldn]

No, Gary from Blackpool with 1 GCSE, two brain cells and three teeth, Dr Ahmed the surgeon did not steal your job.

[Tom @injuredpotato]

That Bellingham goal was the biggest bailout I've ever seen and I was alive for the 2008 financial crisis

[Gary Parrish @GaryParrishCBS]

These dudes have been calling each other the worst President in history for 80 straight minutes — and neither one of them got really offended until their golf skills were questioned. Hahaha.