vivi

crashing the fuck out every month, every week, everyday, every hour, every minute, every second, every millisecond i have never known any form of peace

[vivi @mininspo]

should i take a couple shots before my interview tomorrow or would that make me even more nervous to the point where i throw up..

[vivi @mininspo]

FINALLY got an email for a job interview and panicking so bad. LIKE IM ON THE VERGE OF HYPERVENTILATING. this literally HAPPENS EVERY TIME. i had to force myself to tell my mom about the interview so i wouldn’t back out of it 😭

[vivi @mininspo]

was gonna shave my brows cause they’ve been pissing me off but one of them was saved with plucking but the other one.. i fear i may have to be browless on one side

[vivi @mininspo]

convinced this is god once again dangling something i can’t have in front of my face to punish me

[vivi @mininspo]

found the man of my dreams but his hairline is absolutely abysmal. oh and he has a wife and kid but his hairline.. i think i could look past it tho

[vivi @mininspo]

just found out he’s getting on a glp 1 cause he doesn’t wanna be fat anymore. mind you this is the same man who would CONSTANTLY tell 5-11 year old me i needed to go to the gym and to stop being lazy

[vivi @mininspo]

there’s something so unsettling about seeing the man who played such a vital part in the development of your ed when you were a child, be such a good father to his own kids now

[vivi @mininspo]

he’s so sexy and older than me and an ex marine and literally everything i want in a man GIVE HIM TO MEEEE

[crown @goldiescrown]

i really have no choice anymore

[lumi @lumiagww]

all roads lead back to crying

[vivi @mininspo]

decided to eat breakfast for once so i made myself hard boiled eggs and not even an hour later i saw that the exact eggs i had were being recalled cause of salmonella risk.

[vivi @mininspo]

a month ago i posted about going through the worst depressive episode of my life last year and it finally being over. jinxed myself cause not even a couple weeks later another one started. even worse. multiplied.

[Anxiety @painotes_]

i thought i was at my lowest, but holy fuck, it gets lower

[angel_wings🪽 @fawn_doegirl]

don't ask me what im doing, literally nothing im a loser with no interest in anything and no hobbies im just waiting to die

[kage @sukikage_]

life so private no one knows i'm at my lowest again, struggling so bad with my mental health

[𝖗𝖊𝖉✞ @_redfeels]

i wish there was a way to temporarily kill yourself

[vivi @mininspo]

i always wonder if my dad cares about me at all. and i’ll remember when i woke him up in the middle of the night bawling my eyes out cause i was in so much pain and he immediately got up and took me to urgent care but then i remember he’s also told me to kms multiple times soo

[vivi @mininspo]

begging for one good day. just one. please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please

[vivi @mininspo]

but it never happens so. validation? kinda.

[vivi @mininspo]

it’s so funny to me that i’m an atheist but whenever i don’t wanna be here anymore i turn to god and beg him to let it all be over

[vivi @mininspo]

god please let my time be up please please please please please please please