🧚‍♂️

“I talk a lot, so I’ve learned to just tune myself out.”

[phlip @MrPerfectPhilip]

Apparently, you’re not supposed to comment “nightmare blunt rotation” on your ex’s Instagram with a picture of her husband and new baby

[bt @b__________t]

every day is just spend $40 on nothing and do laundry this cant be the same age my mom was having children at

[charlie @chunkbardey]

taking your keys on a trip feels so silly it’s like hmm yeah lemme bring these just in case where i’m going they have My Door

[caitie delaney @caitiedelaney]

the point of life is going to a good restaurant and getting two cocktails with dinner. that’s it

[The Notorious J.O.V. @whotfisjovana]

︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎ ︎

[melissa broder @melissabroder]

gonna run this by my two best friends who are as insane as i am

[🧚‍♂️ @mintjuulpod666]

@shreknado Yes but I’m gaslighting myself and telling myself I’m just lazy

[🧚‍♂️ @mintjuulpod666]

I wish there was a micro trend museum

[amanda @amandaxmars]

i wish diet coke had a membership i’d be gold tier vip

[🧚‍♂️ @mintjuulpod666]

“I think I identify as lesbian, but promiscuous and desperate”

[🧚‍♂️ @mintjuulpod666]

“Having a broke girlfriend is cool because I spend like 10 dollars on you and you’re so appreciative” -my boyfriend

[໊ @user0000O0]

you know a bitch is crazy if she has 0 likes and keeps tweeting

[⭐️IT GIRL⭐️ @aliyahInterlude]

real bitches grew up playing mancala

[🧚‍♂️ @mintjuulpod666]

My bf just compared me to the annoying orange

[C 💒 @churchofysl]

girls in their 20s grocery list be like:
- smoked salmon
- berries
- organic sourdough
- pasture raised eggs
- greek yogurt
- flowers
- cottage cheese
- figs
- spinach

[🧚‍♂️ @mintjuulpod666]

Lana Del Rey is standing outside of my job finger banging her fans