Matt Soell

Writer. Director. Noisemaker. Creator of Stubbs the Zombie and some other stuff. Hippopotamus enthusiast. Not necessarily in that order.

[Matt Soell @minusman]

Photo taken shortly before @JohnCleese offered him a wafer-thin mint.

[Matt Soell @minusman]

@justin__fischer NICE! Thanks for sharing.

[Matt Soell @minusman]

Like any sane person, I use third-party clients to access this increasingly inhospitable website. If Twitter is deliberately blocking access from these apps, you can find me on Mastodon, https://t.co/qE8Fzp1ScW, and my own site (which I need to revamp anyway).

[Matt Soell @minusman]

@sortedhq The App Store says there is some “Year of the Rabbit” promotion happening for Sorted, but there are no details on what it is or how to access it. Any clues?

[Matt Soell @minusman]

There’s a great idea here: completely cover Trump Tower and Mar-a-Lago under literal mountains of coarse salt.

Forget salting the earth, let’s salt the goddamn airspace while we’re at it.

[Crazy Ass Moments in LatAm Politics @AssLatam]

At the start of Lula's Government, syndicalists cleaned up brazilian Government buldings with coarse salt to "remove Bolsonaro's bad spirit".

[Ross Reelachart @RossReelachart]

Twitter about to look you're driving south down I-95.

[Matt Soell @minusman]

@justin__fischer @GretaThunberg I hope they donate his car collection to the pizza delivery drivers of Romania, with the stipulation that they have to regularly tweet Tate photos of the cars’ leather interiors as they gradually accumulate grease and marinara stains.

[Matt Soell @minusman]

A lot of people credit Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein with the invention of science fiction, but it’s also arguably the invention of the first incel. Repugnant social outcast demands that his dad build him a sex partner. All that’s missing are the cargo shorts and Mountain Dew.

[fat motorcycle twins truther. theyre not dead @fart]

a huge amount of old conservative folks are home alone today, ostracised from their families, lonely and unloved while their children and grandchildren celebrate together. lets take a moment to remember those sad scumbags who did this entirely to themselves and laugh a little

[Matt Soell @minusman]

“Don’t say words you’re gonna regret,” he sang. Well I for one think Alan Parsons was just Projecting.

[Matt Soell @minusman]

@ZPostFacto The Little Digeree-dude.

[Rob Crow 🧢 @rob5d4]

So, elon is anti-censorship the same way some people are pro-life.

[Matt Soell @minusman]

@justin__fischer He’d already said as much:

[Matt Soell @minusman]

Sometimes I meditate on the impossible questions, like “What is the sound of one hand clapping?” or “What is more shameful: to be Elon Musk having fucked Grimes, or to be Grimes having fucked Elon Musk?”

Even the greatest minds are flummoxed by these ineffable head-scratchers.

[Matt Soell @minusman]

Not sure why Trump didn’t hire somebody who knows how to use Photoshop to do his stupid NFTs. It’s not like he’s actually gonna pay them anyway, why not get someone with a modicum of skill?

[Matt Soell @minusman]

@justin__fischer THIS was his “major announcement?” LOL.

[Matt Soell @minusman]

@justin__fischer There goes his QuickBooks endorsement deal.

[Nick Martin @nickmartin]

If Twitter ends up forcing you to hand over your location and other data to continue using the platform, I'm done. This reporting by @ZoeSchiffer and @CaseyNewton is behind a paywall, but it's at least worth signing up for a free trial to read. https://t.co/3SiwLyC9Fs

[Matt Soell @minusman]

@justin__fischer They’re probably waiting for Stallone to actually die before his estate announces the first Zombo movie.