mister

i am 300 years old and i can levitate cigarettes with my brain

[mister @mistertxok]

the first time a woman cried on the phone with me i immediately failed the qte and proceeded to not say a single
word for 10 minutes straight

[lay 𓊆ྀི❤︎𓊇ྀི @mrinnji]

cried otp to my bf and he barely gafed i cant

HE CANT COMFORT IF HIS LIFE DEPENDED ON IT

[ᵉ 🫧 @shuttrbugs]

no esex until emarriage

[🦪 @marygaitspill]

im not depressed but should I get on SSRIs to kill my sexual desire so I can focus on getting my bread up

[sleepy @honeysufferin]

*jerking you off* what are we?

[mister @mistertxok]

@bushluver009 username bushluver009 talking about a humiliation ritual

[mister @mistertxok]

im
sorry

[mister @mistertxok]

asking the Beautiful Woman at trader joes for her discord

[cait @caikiruu]

we are too old for snapchat give me your battlenet handsome

[mister @mistertxok]

calling my bank and asking if i can withdraw a trillion dollars

[mister @mistertxok]

L

[mady @mady4rl]

is your 20s-30s supposed to be lonely or am i just a fcking loser with no friends lol

[mister @mistertxok]

they should make cars that run over pedestrians on purpose but dont have the tesla logo so i can participate without looking lame

[mister @mistertxok]

ive got two apples

[mister @mistertxok]

im like a parked car

[mister @mistertxok]

im
on fortnite

[mister @mistertxok]

what is a moid

[mister @mistertxok]

i dont understand new things and i used to
and its scary

[mister @mistertxok]

i am really old

[sexual energy @poopswag34]

Telling the doctor I jack off when he asks if I’m sexually active

[mister @mistertxok]

my soulmate probably hasn't showered in 4 days