Bat-Mite

BATMAN IS MY SIDEKICK. #DCRP

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

FEAR NOT, BAT-MITE HAS ARRIVED.

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

(Contemplating who else to body swap. Maybe Bruce will let him drive the Batmobile this time.)

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

Now it’s time for me to get my hands on that Batzooka.

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

That was fun.

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

(LAUGHING — holding his belly.)

LOOK AT YOU! Maybe another magician will want to use you for their show!

[𝒁𝒂𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒏𝒂 🪄⊹₊⟡⋆ @ZatannaLive]

《Pokepokepoke! Why is he flying away and- wait why is my hand furry-ohHNnnnoooooOOOOOO!

SHE'S INDEED A WHITE BUNNY!

Angry thump. Angry thump! Thumpthumpthump....thumpthump!!!》

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

If you’re good with Batman, you’re good with me!

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

She’s innocent in this! Poor Canary only got into trouble because of you.

…pfft. I am completely harmless. I am a crime fighter and Batman’s mentor!

[Zatanna Zatara @The1nvoker]

then go bother her instead. you're giving me a headache.

besides, you're far from harmless. you are creature who can move outside of time. every single second you linger here damages the reality we know.

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

(HUFFING. Puffs out his chest, annoyed! Flicks his fingers for dramatic effect, letting out a cackle.)

You’re a rabbit now!

[𝒁𝒂𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒏𝒂 🪄⊹₊⟡⋆ @ZatannaLive]

《Aggressive magician pokes in his weirdly squishy chest oh God are you made of rubber??》

I'd like to see you TRY!

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

Because even that is more exciting than your isolated magic lady in a cool tower life!

At least she’s doing something — while you’re out to trap beings into bottles that mean nO HARM TO YOU!

[Zatanna Zatara @The1nvoker]

( holds up a bandaged hand with busted knuckles. )

how do you think it's going? Dinah has literally nothing in her fridge, so I had to walk to the grocery store. then I ran into this guy calling himself "Brick" and had to beat him and his crew senseless. —

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

I just wanted to check-in with my favorite fishnet wearer! How’s it going so far? Enjoying Canary’s life?

[Zatanna Zatara @The1nvoker]

( it bounces off her temple, jaw clenching, she slowly turns around and fixes him with a murderous glare. )

do not test me, imp. go away.

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

Flicks a small pebble at @The1nvoker’s head.

LAUGHING.

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

(Nodding a few times — he’s got the guilty puppy dog eyes going on; hopefully that’ll help.)

She started it, you know. That witch needs to apologize first.

[— 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙁𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙠𝙞𝙣 𝘽𝙖𝙩.ᐟ ( PARODY ) @PlayboyCrusader]

( It'd have been easier to feel bad if his allies weren't in trouble, but still, a hint of remorse manages to tug at something beneath the cowl as he draws his hand back, prompting a clearing of his throat. )

Fine. Forty-eight hours. No tricks.
And you will exchange apologies.

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

Can’t use your magic if you’re a rabbit! May the fastest magic user win!

[𝒁𝒂𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒏𝒂 🪄⊹₊⟡⋆ @ZatannaLive]

Then I'd turn you into a carrot! Then I'd have your delicious, vitamin-A flavored powers!

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

This body-swapping is more hilarious than I imagined! Where’s Bane?! I have an idea!

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

(Defeated sigh — his bat ears follow his emotional struggle, folding a little in sadness.)

Alright, alright. They are going to return back to themselves within 48 hours — I promise! No tricks.

[— 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙁𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙠𝙞𝙣 𝘽𝙖𝙩.ᐟ ( PARODY ) @PlayboyCrusader]

( Juts a single finger forward, prodding at the newly stationary imp's chest. )

That remains up to you.

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

Oh, sweet-cheeks. She’s trying her best.

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

(GASP! Freezes mid-fly, staring at him with a frown.)

You wouldn’t dare!

[— 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙁𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙠𝙞𝙣 𝘽𝙖𝙩.ᐟ ( PARODY ) @PlayboyCrusader]

( Tick for tack, he's quick to match the other's threat with one of his own - spoken at a low gravelly tone with the intent more like a promise than just a warning. )

If they stay stuck, I'll personally destroy the BATZOOKA before you ever get a chance to see it.

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

You can! You OWN the league!

(He knows Bruce doesn’t own the league, but he kind of THINKS he should.)

Either I get a seat at the JLA headquarters, or they’re stuck, partner.

[— 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙁𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙠𝙞𝙣 𝘽𝙖𝙩.ᐟ ( PARODY ) @PlayboyCrusader]

( Tempted to snatch at the other, his fingers curl ever so slightly into clenched fists, but they don't act... for now. )

Absolutely not. You're way out of line, and I can't let you on the league without a vote.

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

Or I can turn you into a rabbit! That would be funny!

[𝒁𝒂𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒏𝒂 🪄⊹₊⟡⋆ @ZatannaLive]

I think I'm going to keep you in a box with holes until give me what I want...

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

BEGONE! Begone!!!!

[Constantine. @occultblazer]

…What the fuck ‘ave I come back to?

[Bat-Mite @miteybat]

Hmm…

(Circling him in the air, scratching at his non-existent beard as he considers.)

Unrestricted access FOREVER. And I want to be a member of the Justice League!

[— 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙁𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙠𝙞𝙣 𝘽𝙖𝙩.ᐟ ( PARODY ) @PlayboyCrusader]

I don't have twenty sev- 𝙝𝙢𝙥𝙝...

( Irritated as all get out with the fluttering imp, the Caped Crusader bites back an early refute, biding his tongue until the other did as told. )

...And if I let you in, showed you the device, would you restore our allies to their bodies?