Man in the Mitten

Husband. Father. Christian. Engineer

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

“These banger tweets aren’t gonna write themselves”

[The Second Party Podcast @2ndPartyPodcast]

“Hang on honey, we have important things to tweet” -my wife talking to my son

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

And the OG LineRider without a laser mouse

[🚫👁️Drinks on Saturday🇺🇸 @drinkonsaturday]

Kids these days have no idea what we went through...

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

@wrowclif This is how I stay in the loop

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

If there’s one thing I’ve gleaned from studies on memory regarding younger years it’s this:

“Cannot consciously recollect events” is NOT the same as “cannot remember”

Memories are stored-accessed in different ways, especially childhood memories. All the early years stuff goes into long term storage where it affects attitudes and behaviors for the rest of your life

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

@wrowclif We had to buy birth certificates for each of our kids (born in CA & MI). I think it’s dumb. You should just be given one

We waited 2 years to do it for our 2nd and only got it because we were going to Niagara Falls and needed it to cross the border

[Evi ★ @evistrohl]

everyone needs to play ocarina of time and majoras mask

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

I was ready to start throwing a fit with our 2nd.

The nurse said we’d be out by 10:30 so we had them not make us lunch. Then the doctor doing baby checkups was TWO HOURS LATE. Then instead of visiting people in order of “who was scheduled to leave first” he just went alphabetically (we’re an end-of-alphabet last name). I’m pretty sure we were the only ones scheduled to actually leave that day too.

Then they’d put in our pain meds prescription to the hospital pharmacy even though we’d said to go through Costco and there was issues getting someone to actually bring the prescription up.

Oh I was livid and went out and complained half a dozen times. I was on the verge of just walking out when they finally cut the alarm thing off the baby and let us go.

And that’s a big part of why we just did a birthing center with midwives for our 3rd 😅

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

@noknowsgoes We change our baby in the trunk probably once a month if not more. I don’t get how that’s weird

Some people be crazy

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

@FaithLikeAbish2 Ok I know I’m weird here but I love just plain ole normal Cheerios

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

@longstoryfarms We got rid of our microwave a few years back and the only thing we really miss it for is melting butter. Everything is trivial to do another way. We have another way to melt butter it just takes slightly longer/more effort

[Kirk Rollins @nicoraytruth]

“When God wants a great work done in the world or a great wrong righted, he goes about it in a very unusual way. He doesn’t stir up his earthquakes or send forth his thunderbolts. Instead, he has a helpless baby born, perhaps in a simple home out of some obscure mother. And then God puts the idea into the mother’s heart, and she puts it into the baby’s mind. And then God waits. The greatest forces in the world are not the earthquakes and the thunderbolts. The greatest forces in the world are babies.”

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

This reminds me, I was getting frustrated at being ignored the other day so I threatened to cut my 5yo’s ears off and he replied, “but then how will I listen to you?” 😂🙄

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

In my experience, children 5 and under. I’ll probably update my answer in a few months when I have a 6 year old 🥲

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

In my experience, children 5 and under. I’ll probably update my answer in a few months when I have a 6 year old 🥲

[Stormi @Stormi_luv]

What has EARS but does NOT listen ??

[M.A. Franklin @FoundationDads]

Your kids will become like you, and so you must become more like God.

This realization is what drives the sudden maturity of new fathers.

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

This morning baby got into Connect Four and was trying to eat the little pieces. I take them away and clean it up only to turn around 2 minutes later and he’s found a poker chip of the same shape/size 🤣🤦‍♂️

We don’t even play poker! Where did that come from? Am I Sisyphus?

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

Half of parenting is just trying to keep someone with basically zero survival instinct from unaliving themselves

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

Kids these days will never experience the joy of finding how many Wikipedia pages it takes for you to get to Kevin Bacon

[𐌁𐌉Ᏽ 𐌕𐌉𐌌𐌉 @OrevaZSN]

No, I do not want the AI overview.
I want to read a Wikipedia page that leads me to another Wikipedia page, and another, and another, and get lost for hours down a completely unrelated rabbit hole as the gods intended.

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

@idkred3 @drsuffy Ok but did you drink enough water today?

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

https://t.co/jDAYw2C3r5

[Man in the Mitten @mitm_itten]

Happy pride month to those who celebrate.

I’m proud to declare that families are central to God’s plan, that men and woman are created in the image of God and loved by Him. And that marriage and procreation between a man and woman are divinely appointed.