panicked oracle

former baby

[panicked oracle @mle_el]

a fun fact about me is that I once missed a flight because I thought mountain standard time was an extremely chill way-of-life slogan in Colorado and not, in fact, a standardized American time zone

[panicked oracle @mle_el]

https://t.co/GOtyCYOk90

[Dimitri @thedimitri]

What a time to be alive

[layne 🐺🦴 bryanling #420 @krakenpens]

claim your gold star NOW!!!!

[soup🕷️ @thrluv]

“i asked chat gpt” okay well i took 6 benadryl & asked the hatman

[panicked oracle @mle_el]

the other thing is worse

[panicked oracle @mle_el]

I guess two big things have changed since the last time I was on this app and one of them is that now I’m one of those people that has 19 unread texts

[Patches O’Houlihan @sondraa]

The people on Love Island have no clue we just bombed Iran

[panicked oracle @mle_el]

@madmarx94 @kstewhbu Mark S chooses the blue one though …

Blue - innie
Red - outie

[panicked oracle @mle_el]

@butchvillanelle Yess it’s like a stand alone music video!

[panicked oracle @mle_el]

@GoldDerby Tramell’s response hella milchik coded

[monica @waystarroyhoe]

go birds

[panicked oracle @mle_el]

space jam 2001

[panicked oracle @mle_el]

@AndrewYang Booooo

[Jess Dweck @TheDweck]

This means there’s a Waluigi Mangione who works in private equity

[matt bernstein @mattxiv]

the jokes about the healthcare CEO dying are funny but they are also extremely revealing of how angry the average american is with the healthcare system and if i was a democratic politician i would be thinking long and hard about how to tap into that anger

[panicked oracle @mle_el]

@HumanProbably2 @ghost_prole What makes you so certain he wasn’t a professional?

[Kurt Eichenwald @kurteichenwald]

Since United Healthcare killers shells said “delay, deny, depose” & police said he came from GA, I read all lawsuits there on UH unjust claim denials. There are so many, including where UH delayed till plaintiffs ran out of $. Some ended in deaths of kids. suspect list is endless