Moe Nado

Bongo bongo bongo, I don't want to leave the Congo.

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

Fall on my sword? Nah bro, I'm bouncing on it crazy style

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

I'm in the bathroom, double handing the Febreeze can, spraying the air like I'm Doris Miller shooting down planes at a Pearl Harbor

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

Length 14", girth 8 1/2". Bitches call me legal size

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

German is such a fun language. Something like dishwashing will be called "spün laundry"

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

She Goggin on my Walter til I Fallout

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

Call me Timmy, the way I Turner on

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

Okay, so I guess I misinterpreted "flight or fight" because now I'm getting arrested at the airport after my flight was canceled

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

You're either shot through the heart, or you're hot through the shart.

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

I'm putting crushed up Flintstone Vitamins in my Baja Blast. Call that shit a Yabba Dabba Dew

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

In the casino with Leatherface, playing Texas Chainsaw Holdem

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

Call me Advil, cuz Ibuprofen

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

I got AIDS from the toilet at Taco Bell and I got a chalupa for it. My only regret is not being able to get AIDS twice

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

Call me a Hungry Hungry Hippo, the way I be swallowing these balls

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

She Cowboy on my Be till I Bop

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

On today's episode of "Things that I wouldn't have to learn if I had stopped to think" : Spicy pork rinds dipped in spicy queso are not a good thing to eat when you have a sore throat

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

The government doesn't want you to know this, but Cortisone shots are actually just Sprite from McDonald's

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

Life hack: If you love ice cold water, mix some anti-freeze into your bottle. Now you can put it in the freezer without it freezing and still have it be super cold!

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

@_LONGTAD_ Same except for Cyclone

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

@toonsgowild Watch me swooce right in!

[Moe Nado @moe_nado]

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