Thomas Offen (not parody?)

Victoria Concordia Crescit

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

It's been.... fun. 🫡

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

And in the end, Maria *WAS* the next #TheBachelorette

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

@KristenGBaldwin I don’t see it

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

@MikaylaYoung18 Listen, I’ve seen him on TV for two seconds, I think I know what I’m talking about.

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

Who’s going to tell Jenn that Sam is not a — quote-unquote — “cowboy”? He lives in Myrtle Beach building houses, presumably while not on a horse. #TheBachelorette

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez @AOC]

Lead?

More Democrats voted to keep government open than Republicans did.

We had to drag your party kicking and screaming across the finish line to fund schools and pay servicemembers.

And that was after you wasted the whole week on a joke impeachment hearing as shutdown loomed

[Stu Holden @stuholden]

100% the best header I’ve ever seen from a Goalkeeper.

Provedel scores 94th minute equalizer for Lazio with a thunderous header… Love it!!!!!

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

@MenInBlazers Arteta ants to win the league with a negative goal differential!

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

@BeschlossDC Truth is back and it is PISSED

[Michael Beschloss @BeschlossDC]

While Ramaswamy spoke in Lancaster NH, a sign that said "Truth" fell over on him:

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

@bcatleagle Now I wish it hadn't.

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

@bcatleagle I had to reload the page and it worked

[Men in Blazers @MenInBlazers]

FOOTBALL IS THE GREATEST. A GAME OF FOOTBALL THAT WILL LEAVE EVEN THE NEUTRAL REACHING FOR THE CALM APP. ARSENAL FANS. MASSIVE COMEBACK WIN. HOW MUCH THAT GOT YOU BELIEVING THAT...THIS...IS YOUR YEAR?!

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

YOUR NEXT BACHELOR!!! #TheBachelorette

[McSweeney's @mcsweeneys]

"The cost of all tickets will still be just $5, plus a convenience fee of $20.95, a processing fee of $1.17, an equity tax of 0.2% of your gross annual income, a translation fee of $4.22, and a hazard abatement surcharge of $0.22." https://t.co/UG9JfuKkxS

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

@BachDet

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

If you rearrange the the letters in “Men Tell All”, it spells out “It’s OK to Take This Week Off, We Get It”. #TheBachelorette

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

Props to the two randos by the pool who were talking to Charity but didn’t sign the waivers and got their their faces blurcled #TheBachelorette

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

It’s been an hour and I’m still processing Xavier’s “I was out for five days with my boyzzzzzzzz” defense #TheBachelorette

[Thomas Offen (not parody?) @moleculeboy]

When Dotun said “I have to admit something”, I thought for a split-second he was going to say “I’m a serial cheater and you might be might be my next victim” but no one would actually say that right?
…
RIGHT???

#TheBachelorette