Molly Huebner

I'm fabulous and random... and fabulously random. Oh, and I love coffee.

[SUGARCULT @Sugarcult]

New Merch! https://t.co/DJs2DA9fgG

[Molly Huebner @mollyjoy01]

I swear to god @UHC just loves to deny life saving medication. How in the hell did it take you guys TEN minutes to review my extensive medical history and make a decision on a prescription?!? Make it make sense.

[Molly Huebner @mollyjoy01]

Checked in with Mitch McConnell today. We FaceTimed for 20 minutes today. He was wearing Applebottom Jeans and boots with the fur.

[Molly Huebner @mollyjoy01]

@Sugarcult I miss you guys. Come backkkk

[Governor Newsom Press Office @GovPressOffice]

J.D. “JUST DANCE” VANCE, WHO NOBODY LIKED UNTIL TRUMP PICKED HIM OUT OF THE "BARGAIN BIN" IN THE WALMART CLEARANCE SECTION, WENT ON FOX TO TRASH ME, GAVIN C. NEWSOM, AMERICA'S MOST POPULAR GOVERNOR. THE DANCING QUEEN CAN’T STOP! I LIVE RENT-FREE IN HIS HEAD (VERY TINY SPACE, ALMOST NO ROOM WITH "THE COUCH"). HE IS VERY WEAK... THE GUY CAN'T RUN, TAKES MORE "VACATIONS" THAN ANY VICE PRESIDENT IN HISTORY (AND WE’VE HAD SOME LAZY ONES!), GOT CAUGHT TAKING PHOTOS IN THE BATHROOM (VERY SICK!) AFTER APPLYING HIS EYELINER AND WEARS A COMMUNIST RED SHIRT. PERFECT, SINCE "CHAIRMAN TRUMP" NOW OWNS INTEL AND TELLS HIM WHAT TO WEAR. WHY DOES FOX AIR THIS NONSENSE? THEY EDIT THE TAPES, AND EVEN TRY TO MAKE HIM LOOK "SMART," BUT HE IS A TOTAL JOKE. FOX SHOULD BE ASHAMED. STOP GIVING AIRTIME TO A TOTAL LOSER. HIS TIME WOULD BE BETTER SPENT PRACTICING FOR HIS SOON “DEBUT” ON DANCING WITH THE STARS. EVERYONE’S LAUGHING AT HIM, BELIEVE ME! THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER! — GCN

[KT "Special MI6 Operation" @KremlinTrolls]

Don't forget: @JDVance is a failed drag queen.

[Governor Newsom Press Office @GovPressOffice]

MANY PEOPLE ARE SAYING — AND I AGREE — THAT I, GAVIN C. NEWSOM (AMERICA’S FAVORITE GOVERNOR) DESERVE THE NOBEL PEACE PRIZE. WHY? BECAUSE OF THE “MOST INCREDIBLE MAPS IN THE HISTORY OF MAPPING” (EVEN COLUMBUS). THESE MAPS WILL END THE “VERY RIGGED” ELECTIONS, MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN (MAGA!!!), RETAKE CONGRESS “FOR THE PEOPLE”, AND SAVE DEMOCRACY. NOBODY ELSE COULD HAVE DONE THIS — CERTAINLY NOT THE “SELF-PROCLAIMED” MASTER DEALMAKER DONALD “TACO” TRUMP (TINY HANDS) WHO MISSED “THE DEADLINE” AND LOST (SAD!). PEACE THROUGH MAPS — NO ONE HAS EVER THOUGHT OF THIS BEFORE. I AM THE “PEACE TIME” GOVERNOR NOW, STOPPING “POLITICAL WARS” BEFORE THEY START. HARMONY, UNITY, EVEN LOVE. THE NOBEL COMMITTEE HAS GIVEN THIS AWARD TO LESSER PEOPLE FOR MUCH LESS. I, GAVIN C. NEWSOM, ACTUALLY EARNED IT. THE WORLD WILL BE SAFER, KINDER, AND FRANKLY MORE “BEAUTIFUL” BECAUSE OF MY MAPS. GIVE GAVIN THE NOBEL, MANY ARE SAYING. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER! — GCN

[Anonymous @YourAnonCentral]

Sources say Donald Trump cried from the humiliation he experienced today, keep it up everyone.

[Alex Cole @acnewsitics]

That's not how you spell Colombia, you fucking idiots.

[Alex Cole @acnewsitics]

SCOTUS: States rights!

States: Okay, we are removing all insurrectionists from our ballots.

SCOTUS: Wait, not like that!

#SupremeCourt

[Grubhub @Grubhub]

RT if you’re already through your snacks & we might deliver you a restock in your DMs 👀 #loveislate

[Molly Huebner @mollyjoy01]

Y'all @netflix has about 5.2 seconds to get their shit together. @LoveisBlindShow broke the internet

[Molly Huebner @mollyjoy01]

@Tampax Don't apologize for the greatest tweet of all time.

[Molly Huebner @mollyjoy01]

Hey @WAGSocialCare your pharmacy gave my minor child the wrong drug (I didn't know the generic name) for THREE whole months before another doc noticed the error. You could've killed him! And the pharmacist wiped the history clean of the old prescription ever being used. Sketchy.

[Molly Huebner @mollyjoy01]

I'm supposed to be strong.

[Molly Huebner @mollyjoy01]

I've reached the point in parenting where my 13 year old son yells at me in his sleep. Glad I can annoy you mid REM cycle, son.

[Molly Huebner @mollyjoy01]

@Torrid I dm'd you, you left me on read! Was it something I said?

[Molly Huebner @mollyjoy01]

It's great to have a @Torrid VIP line to use just to wait on hold for 30 minutes and then just hear someone breathing in your ear. So, called a store for help and was told I probs don't have the right phone number. Y'all only say Torrid like 6 times at the beginning of the call.

[Molly Huebner @mollyjoy01]

Hey @MilwaukeePolice can we hold off on collecting garbage until we #findmajorharris ? We all need to check our dumpsters and #findthatbaby so his family can have some closure. Better yet, #prayforamiracle #prayformajorharris #searchformajorharris

[Molly Huebner @mollyjoy01]

@BenHandelman @MilwaukeePolice I don't see anything else out there about this.