GhostMomma

Let's all just make it to adulthood and call it a win. Mom to a 5yo, a 3yo, and a baby. Avi by @emilychibwana. My children are pale, pale ghostly gingers.

[GhostMomma @momma_ghost]

My son had a nightmare about dinosaurs, so I said, "Don't worry, sweetie. The dinosaurs are all dead. A meteor killed them."

And now he's afraid of meteors. 😬

[GhostMomma @momma_ghost]

@modernmomese They have impeccable aim.

[GhostMomma @momma_ghost]

@justinmatic5000 The answer is yes.

[GhostMomma @momma_ghost]

I made a friend at work. He's new here, but he seems pretty eager to learn the ropes.

[GhostMomma @momma_ghost]

@MamaNeedsACoke Well, you'll be happy to know that he quit after lunch. Just left the desk and never came back. These new hires are not what they used to be. 🙄

[Unexpected SAHM @UnexpectedSAHM]

Funny how I’m expected to physically and emotionally bankrupt myself to care for everyone else yet I’m the only person in this house that doesn’t have their own space to retreat to.

[GhostMomma @momma_ghost]

@justinmatic5000 We found mine from childhood and turned it on. And then, a day later, my 5yo and I let it die the death it deserved. I recently dropped it in water just to make sure.

[Toy Robot @justinmatic5000]

Googled "People I can lie to." And got a list of dating apps and dentists.

[Mama Needs A Coke @MamaNeedsACoke]

Me: Is having one drink a night bad?

Hubs: We have four kids. I’d say you having just one a night is pretty good.

[Mama Needs A Coke @MamaNeedsACoke]

Kids today have iPads, but when I was little my parents kept me busy on road trips by saying, ‘keep an eye on the trailer, and let us know if it falls off.’

[Mama Needs A Coke @MamaNeedsACoke]

Eating in my 40s is confusing: I’m young enough that I still need to take care of my body, but old enough that I don’t want to risk having a salad as my last meal.

[GhostMomma @momma_ghost]

@COkunlola @crabbyneedsanap I came here to say this 😂

[GhostMomma @momma_ghost]

I'M (technically) ALIVE. BURIED UNDER WORK AVALANCHE. SEND COFFEE AND BEER.

[GhostMomma @momma_ghost]

"Aww, yeah, it's hard when we can't bring our toy golf club into the car" and other strange ways to empathize with my toddler.

[GhostMomma @momma_ghost]

@MattieRobert3 So cute! I love the red top (or bathing suit?)

[GhostMomma @momma_ghost]

Me: I'm not crying.

Them: It's okay to be sad.

Me: No really, I just have anterior basement membrane dystrophy in my left eye.

Them:

Me: Or right yeah, I'm definitely just sad.

[Satirical Mommy @SatiricalMommy]

Whoever said diamonds are a girl’s best friend must have forgotten about pockets

[GhostMomma @momma_ghost]

@justinmatic5000 LIVING LARGE

[GhostMomma @momma_ghost]

@Sasparks47 Eek! What was it? I studiously avoid nightmare material!

[GhostMomma @momma_ghost]

@emilychibwana Congratulations, Emily!! What awesome news! What's the spacing between your kids? I bet they're so excited! ❤️