David Moose

Noted moaner at customer service departments.

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@ReemAmirIbrahim Yes, though sadly nothing has ever tasted as disappointing compared with what your mind thinks it will taste like.

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@DavidPGCSE @CageFooName As always, you’re an inspiration…

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@TheRealJamieKay When people shit themselves at their desk and people say ‘looks like you’ve done a Jamie Kay!’

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@OldRoberts953 And here I was thinking the thing Kumar surely understands the least is comedy.

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@Heccles94 They don’t let you do any sort of life and death nursing, do they? Because if you don’t understand the basic detail of income, profit and profit margins, then I do fear for those taken ill on the Isle of Wight. Or you could just be shamelessly grifting to morons, as usual.

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@policylaila How’s business at your mum’s hotel these days, you crank liar?

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@lukerobertblack It remains a mystery to me why pudgy ginger men who can’t get girls seem so prone to converting to a religion where in some quarters girls are little more than a form of property. A Poirot-level mystery, I tell you.

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@LoftusSteve @LBC ‘This is something I say carefully… LAZY AS FUCK MIDWIT SLUR!’

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@ZackPolanski It’s good that you haven’t even higher profile these days, because then more and more people can see what a fucking idiot you are every time you open your mouth.

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@BarbaraRich_law @SexMattersOrg I am somehow pleased that I recently didn’t get a job at the City of London Corporation. I was initially very annoyed, but am relieved I at least do not have to condone this level of crap, even in a professional only capacity.

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@MysteriosoX Zack Polanski?

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@DavidPGCSE @5Pillarsuk It's somehow even funnier when you read it; I thought it would be like 'avoid areas with lots of the gays', but instead it's 'don't worry if you're aroused by that man in leather chaps.'

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@cjsnowdon I came here to see if you'd had grief for that hashtag, and refreshingly, not yet.

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@jokers_tailor Waitrose have made some shocking staffing decisions recently, but this seems to be the one they got right.

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@GypsumFantastic @HXValley I encountered her briefly when she was a Tory candidate during the last Mayoral and Assembly elections, and I’ve never wanted somebody to not win more in my life having done so.

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@raelbrav I am genuinely amazed your wife hasn’t banned you from posting.

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@NadineDorries I’m not really sure questioning Rupert’s intelligence while also not remotely understanding what a Freudian slip is reflects particularly well on you. Perhaps you should have another bottle of wine and a good cry about why nobody wants to give you a peerage?

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@MysteriosoX Community notes would agree with you.

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@DavidPGCSE It’s like if the Ralph Wiggum ‘I’m helping’ gif smashed a load of meth and/or crack.

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@lukerobertblack Joseph seems to think you only become an activist thanks to a special magic hat, or something. Not, you know, standing for a party and also actively campaigning for its candidates…