Morgan

[Sophia @its_Sophia_24]

whoever came up with lefty loosey righty tighty absolutely cranked it out of the park on that one

[smol silly cat @Catsillyness]

They bullied him for his new turtle bookbag :(

[octopus/caveman @octopuscaveman]

I wish Google had memories like Facebook where it would say on this day 6 years ago you googled “is Bruno mars gay” and “how to stop diarrhea”

[Janel Comeau 🍁 @VeryBadLlama]

microdosing a European vacation by walking 23,000 steps in shoes that aren’t really meant for it and then eating a piece of cheese outdoors

[dinosaur @dinosaurs1969]

unfortunately i have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier man

[Kristen @Kica333]

Flour company: What if we sell it in a paper bag that’s not fully sealed at the bottom?

[azndoll ꕤ.+* @starsingerz]

why r we boiling nylon babe

[poppa @popitforpoppa]

hug y'all ex tight because mine really done with me this time

[𝒵𝒾𝓀✯ @_Gottalovezik]

The term “calm down” has calmed exactly 0 people throughout human history.

[dinosaur @dinosaurs1969]

bout to watch a scary movie so i googled 'security guard' to feel safe

[ci 𓅓 @cicireion]

imagine going home and realizing they aired your spit start in 4k

[dinosaur @dinosaurs1969]

today is my dog's birthday so he is allowed a cigarette

[kissing kass @hierophantyeet]

engaging in deforestation (trimming my bush)

[ηιүα ♛ @niy2pretty]

Doing things out of Fanta>>

[𝓤. @_fuego98]

Men generally have the warmest bodies because they’re straight from hell