morgan

[morgan @morgmschneider]

Been eating like a mouse lately. Cheese, bread, bottles of wine. Rarely does a vegetable pass through my lips

[morgan @morgmschneider]

Tolerance is low rn, they callin me two beer queer

[morgan @morgmschneider]

eating kimchi at the cemetery with my puppet

[morgan @morgmschneider]

I am the reason why men are so scared to talk to women at bars ❤️

[morgan @morgmschneider]

Just like Jesus I am also friends with prostitutes, whores, and thieves

[morgan @morgmschneider]

If you plopped current Morgan in the jersey shore in 2010 she could pull Vinny Guadagnino

[weird medieval guys @WeirdMedieval]

sad drunk woman, france, ca. 1405

[morgan @morgmschneider]

This summer has been so humbling I’m gonna start reading the Bible again

[morgan @morgmschneider]

For the ninth year in a row Boom Clap by Charli XCX is the song of the summer!

[morgan @morgmschneider]

Eating triscuits feels like I’m munching on a wicker basket

[morgan @morgmschneider]

Oh so you make one dead grandma joke and suddenly you’re the bad guy ✋🏼🤚🏼

[morgan @morgmschneider]

Downloading Dreamwork’s Trolls for my plane ride to Germany

[morgan @morgmschneider]

My chiropractor told me I have the posture of a shrimp

[morgan @morgmschneider]

I wore my overalls today (for the first time in a while) and the pockets were full of jelly beans!!!

[🔻israa 🇵🇸 فلسطين حرة FREE 🇸🇩&🇨🇩 @israaverse]

to get the full cat owner experience you should get one of each of these

[sophie @brandsophie1]

grabbing him by the scruff of his neck and lifting him up like he’s a kitten

[morgan @morgmschneider]

I am neither woman nor man,
but a bear full of stuffing!

[morgan @morgmschneider]

Georgia O’Queeffe is my favorite artist

[morgan @morgmschneider]

“If Morgan goes missing the first place I’m lookin is the mall”

[morgan @morgmschneider]

“women don’t have hobbies 🤣”
men’s hobbies: