Hobbled hottie

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

Why does diuretic mean that you pee a lot but diarrhea means that you poop a lot

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

New recession indicator, I'm dating men again

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

Lola Young looks and sounds like Bobby Hill in drag

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

God give me the strength to serve cunt today 🙏

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

Two episodes into The Ultimatum. So confused, don't understand what's happening, can't figure out what happened to the walls. Thought I was watching Love is Blind. 🤦‍♀️

[P.b.Freire @Freire1Pb]

Ont not many aware, Ford gov removed acting auditor general Nick Stavropoulos after scathing audit on Ontario Science Centre, healthcare and environment on 6 Dec 2023, then Ford gov shut down Queens Park (early) escape accountability and appt Shelley Spence as auditor general.

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

@Versace Versace for the Nintendo DS

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

I need to make my boyfriend a card for Valentine's Day but I can't think of anything that rhymes with gaslight

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

@PopCrave That is the look of a man who just shit himself

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

Tryin'a drink a Mint Julep tonight

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

@grandmap0ppers Woah whaaaaaaaaat!?

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

✨feeling fertile and wealthy ✨

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

My bedroom is unfeng-shuiable

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

Had pink eye twice in the last month and just found out it's because my dog farts in my face while I'm sleeping 🙃

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

Googly eyes, google I's, google lies

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

Flamin hot today burns when you pee tomorrow

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

Ever think about how much you wish you could fuck Tony the tiger

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

Definitely would not fuck the Cheetos cheetah, something about those sunglasses screams herpes

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

Marry Fuck Kill, Snap, Crackle, and Pop

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

Honestly all my fault, I never asked him if he would love me if I was a worm

[Hobbled hottie @morphinequeen_]

When you're going into early menopause and you ask your boyfriend to be more emotionally supportive and he breaks up with you 🙃