ryan cronin

Sometimes I like my own tweets, but only if I think I really earned it.

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

Why didn’t she respond

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

@LoggyTeaser @LBBStables Have you considered naming the horse “Ryan the Horse”?

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

Is my shin swelling up because I accidentally kicked it on a bench?

OR is my body just fortifying it’s defenses against an increasingly tumultuous world??

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

It’s weird that “No thanks” has become shorthand for “No, thanks” because really without the comma the phrase fully reverses any sense of gratitude. Now it means: I give you no thanks for this, not a single thanks at all.

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

@Buncahn I loved Hamilton

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

Microsoft WOULD be the company to create an ai that immediately turns hostile towards humans

https://t.co/Nqi23fOxsT

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

Where do horses get off having those weird-looking, backwards, scissor-lift hind legs?? Knees go forward bub

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

Is he a poorly made robot, an evil robot, or a robot pet that just peed in the house?

[gianmarco @GianmarcoSoresi]

The bar is low for restaurants in Tennessee

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

@Ygrene Jude Law has a weird look these days

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

@baileyt227 Is it lit, should I try it?

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

What kind of absolute maniac would go to their doctor and say “I saw an ad for this drug on TV I think you should give it to me”

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

@josepedia_ Yeah I guess that makes sense but even then I feel like I would do similarly and research online to find options. The TV ads usually feel biased and try to downplay the side effects, that’s why they list them off quickly while they distract you with crappy stock footage of smiles

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

My favorite part of Harry Potter Legacy is that whenever he does the parry spell he yells something that sounds like “Potato!”

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

Made this remix just now. It’s based on a song by @okaykayaouch

Give it a listen👂🏻

https://t.co/yokVFgeON7

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

If I unclick the “receive marketing emails and newsletters” button and your company still sends me marketing emails and newsletters, you should be burned at the stake like a witch

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

Have you ever been really full but also thirsty? It’s terrifying

[ryan cronin @mostferatu]

Baby Keem voice:

“View. Tweet. Activity.”