today luke wore the shirt I made him. it was also one of the lowest days in this fandom so far. it's left me feeling a bit raw and frayed around the edges.
I own my faults, I don't claim perfection. I try to show how that I care (bc I do). and I don't hold grudges or lash out.
right now it feels like there's one or more individuals who are actively trying to push me out of this little corner of the fandom I found. who feel like I deserve this space, even when all I do is try. try to belong, try to spread cheer, try to encourage, try to lighten.
tell me directly. I won't lash out, I won't deny or deflect. I will own that shit and do whatever I can to make it right.
ask any of my friends. anyone who really knows me. I own, I learn, I do better. but you have to talk to me as an adult.
please stop, that's all I'm asking.
not because I've done anything wrong, but because I feel surveilled, stalked, judged, and hated from the shadows. I don't deserve to feel like this. I deserve to be approached like an adult. if I've hurt anyone, offended anyone, made anyone uncomfortable... call me out.