If Twitter crashes and you need to find me, the hell you will. I've got a two day head start on you, which is more than I need. I speak a dozen languages, know every local custom, I'll blend in, disappear, you'll never see me again.
My wife bought this at a consignment store while I was out of town. The dogs bark and growl at it. I keep thinking it’s one of the dogs. Just bad vibes all the way from this reindeer. 👎
Sadly, they wound up rejecting my first choice of outfit, but my backup outfit was also fabulous, and moreover showed my tattoo! (I negotiated for that, I had a bit more leverage with them this time around lol). So whatever else, I'd be confident in how I looked
every year for the last million years i've entered the @DURAFLAME giveaway &every year i whisper to myself in a mitch hedberg voice, "naturally i was looking for the duraflame tree!" &I'm just saying this year it would be really cool to win &say that to @chriscasperhuh forever
As I’ve said before, no one should be in jail just for using or possessing marijuana.
Today, I’m taking steps to end our failed approach. Allow me to lay them out.
A year ago today, I was in LA, waiting to fulfill a dream. The year since has been full of good days, but by far the best one was May 9th, when Genevieve and I got married. Without her, none of the other good days would have happened. I’m so lucky to share my life with her!👰♀️❤️👰♀️
logged back in twitter for the first time in months bc i used the @officeladiespod 's chutzpah to get a big raise & like a good american i used it to splurge on a little @khloekardashian drip. cannot wait for sherpashacket fall ✨ go me and go koko go 💙