Mr Smith

Do you sell wasps? No? But there's one in your window?

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

@WoodmanGav you can buy those shovels in the UK they're called Alabamma shovels or Irish shovels depending on the shape 😂

[FindMangodza @FindMangodza]

Please help us find Shayne Mangodza! Last seen on the night of Saturday 9th February in Ilford. Shayne was wearing all black. Any information gratefully received! Please RT! #mangodza #ilford

[FindMangodza @FindMangodza]

@Get_Hench_CEO @dulwichhamletfc, @ForwardHamlet @DHFC_Community @officialclarets, @AveleyFC, @tilburyfc, @cheshuntfcscore, @harrowboro_fc, @TheMotormen Can we RT the above please, guys. Shayne played as a centre half for all your clubs throughout the 2000's. Been missing since 9th Feb.

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

@leannaelliee Should've been him in that Land Rover not Prince Philip

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

Piers Morgan such a cunt! That is all!

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

@Dazthepigeon @Ffs_OMG 😂😂😂

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

@scorgie691 You filthy horny little bastard

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

Time for a serious reshuffle on life!

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

@charlipearce I'm just not sure I'm ready to take that step yet 🤣

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

Sometimes I bang my head against a brick wall and ask mysllef "What the actual fuck?" When people put rashers of bacon in the oven instead of the grill or pan? 😫

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

@leannaelliee Makes us all fatter hun 💁🏻‍♂️😂

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

@charlipearce But you can get it just as crispy in the pan or grill? Bacon doesn't have to be submerged in water juice to be cooked does it? The mind boggles. I'm so judging you right now 😂

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

@leannaelliee Who the fuck does that though 🤷🏻‍♂️

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

SwitchBlade Smiles.

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

@charlipearce Try again Monday? 😂

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

Struggling to find even the tiniest fuck to give back at work today, it's a stubborn NO from me today Hun 💁🏻‍♂️

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

@leannaelliee Aren't you always? 😉😂

[Mr Smith @MrSmiffler]

The thought of going back to work tomrorw makes me want to jump out of a plane and dive head first into a swimming pool of broken glass!