charli pearce

expect nothing and you will never be disappointed

[Science girl @sciencegirl]

Baby goats in pyjamas

[Malala Yousafzai @Malala]

This Barbie has a Nobel Prize 💖 He’s just Ken

[TechnicallyRon (On all the platforms) @TechnicallyRon]

I took 1 star reviews of #Barbie from furious men on letterboxd and put them on the posters because it makes the film seem ever cooler.

[Rach @RachaelvsWorld]

never look directly at The Sun

[Russell Howard @russellhoward]

WAP was MENTAL

[Sandford Police Commentary @Sandford_Police]

We received a report this morning that the complainants neighbour had deliberately told them the wrong bin choice for bin day, meaning that they unwittingly put the wrong bin out

This type of behaviour is cruel and unnecessary

Completely unacceptable

[Man vs Baby @mattcoyney]

I’m only tuning in to see if Louis is still a fucking legend.

[Fesshole🧻 @fesshole]

I have a tendency to not finish books and TV shows because of the finality of it. As long as I keep them unfinished, I'll still have more time with those characters to look forward to.

[Anon Opin. @anon_opin]

Parents need to nip this Prime drink crap in the bud by waiting outside the school gates drinking it themselves. Problem solved in an afternoon.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Pancake Day Schedule:

- Wake up
- See if Father Pancake has been
- Open all your pancakes
- Cook Pancake Lunch
- Watch King’s Pancake Speech
- Fall asleep for a bit
- Watch a pancake film
- Make sandwich from pancake leftovers
- Bed

[Fesshole🧻 @fesshole]

If you get an email from me saying 'Perfect, thank you' then it usually means I just can't be bothered any more trying to get better work out of you.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

“But you can eat pancakes any day of the year!”

No thank you, we shall do the British thing of waiting until the appropriate day, called Pancake Day, upon which we will eat pancakes until sick of pancakes and requiring of no further pancakes for another year.

[Anon Opin. @anon_opin]

If supermarkets placed pitta bread next to the houmous millions more pots of houmous would be saved from the shame of non-consumption.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Shoutout to everyone who likes to seal a packet of biscuits by simply pushing the open end up against a wall.

[Anon Opin. @anon_opin]

Grease 2 is better than Grease and everyone who disagrees is wrong. I will die on this hill.