Mr Smiley

Follow this and it is my responsibility to feed best funny tweets in your news feed. Hilarious jokes, GF- BF funny liners, meme, adult jokes, pics, best RTs.

[Mr Smiley @MrSmileyTweet]

@kaushalism Ppl ask because if the bus is already full then it might not take you. No option but to wait for next. Happened to me many times hence the question 😂

[Mr Smiley @MrSmileyTweet]

@heyitsJudeD You don’t need to do all this. Your tweets are amazing

[the new fiction @thenewfiction]

Tonight they come together and fill the air with the most powerful magic they have left: laughter.

[The B. @anerdonfire2]

I can feel a giant fuck up coming, I better stretch.

[John T. Biggs @biggspirit]

You have freedom of speech, but you are not required to use it every single day.

[Lady M ❤ @LadyM_07]

She'd lost her words
and he found them,
added music to them
and gave them back to her.

[Mr Smiley @MrSmileyTweet]

@LW3210 @UkhadFeko @CoolFunnyTweet Yes even I am seeing same...can’t follow

[𝗣𝗲𝘀𝗵𝗮𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗶 𝗚𝘂𝗿𝗿 @Pakhtunaa]

If you’re loosing an argument...
get naked.

[iJoey @jumpdashark]

Practice safe sex and go fuck yourself.

[Chad Read @squirrel74wkgn]

[at interview]

Boss: So, we’ve narrowed it down to you two

Her: *unbuttons blouse a little*

Me: *unzips cargo pants into shorts*

[Just J @junejuly12]

Calories in one pistachio: 4

Calories burned opening one pistachio: 2,753

Take that, kale.

[AtticusFinch79 @AtticusFinch79]

WAITER: how do take your coffee

ME: *looking down at my scarred hands* preferably in a cup

[adam @molotov_moktail]

Are you there God? It's me, your big disappointment

[the hype @TheHyyyype]

WIFE: i have a gynecologist exam today

ME: what?? i didn't even know you were in med school

[RaspberryheART @Jenny4ashley]

Does anyone know what we're supposed to be doing?

[Swishergirl @Swishergirl24]

Your secret is safe with me as long as it's boring.

[Mr Smiley @MrSmileyTweet]

CIGARETTE: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other.