Noelle Shipley

I’m a GenX teacher and a single mother and writer and I used to use twitter for so-called high minded ideals but now it’s my cynical outlet

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

@atrupar United we stand, divided we fall.

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

I wish parenting burned calories.

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

My child: earns honors on the National Latin Exam; can’t pass a captcha to save his life.

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

@ask_aubry I think we’re missing his real point. All we have to do is stop Starbucks and we’ll have this period thing. We can have our periods and still have Pokemoto for lunch every day.

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

@jemelehill It’s deconstructed macaroni and cheese. Fancy.

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

@StephenKing “Oh, it’s raining? I hadn’t noticed.” Carrie in “Four Weddings and a Funeral”

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

@Death_Bow We’d use wooden wine crates anchored to the wall as shadow box shelves. Had to visit a bunch of liquors stores to get the wooden ones.

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

I’m annoyed to no end by people who emphasize love by writing “loveeeeeee.” Clearly that says “lovey.” Obviously it should be “looooooooooooove.”

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

Apparently today is the biggest travel day of the year. As opposed to the 50 previous years of my life. Like that crazy heavy travel Arbor Day, 1974.

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

@JasonSCampbell However, from a scientific standpoint, it makes perfect sense for a seasponge to wear pants and live in a pineapple under the sea.

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

#Technobladethetinyturtle #commonmuskturtle

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

I feel so badly for the #Hubble. It has to be thinking, “What did I provide you? Faulty numbers? #JamesWebb goes up and there’s no memorial for me. No RIP #HubbleTelescope. Thanks for all the photos above my dentist’s chair.” https://t.co/oXn6Kd2ePB

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

Actual footage of me dealing with all the shit

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

You know how they say God only gives you the burden that you’re able to carry on your shoulders? Isn’t that a real dick move on God’s part ?

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

@KinyonNewsNet @lesiavasylenko While I miss your usual format, I do appreciate your summary on Ukraine. It feel as though you hit on exactly what I need to know.

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

@KinyonNewsNet @Quiznos That Jesus. He really has some good ideas.

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

As Annie Savoy said, “Hit ‘em where they ain’t!” #Ukraine #Pornhub #RussiaUkraineWar

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

Harry Nilsson’s side hustle while he worked at the bank was monumental - Mournin' Glory Story https://t.co/pQCcmkw4IQ via @YouTube. #HarryNilsson

[The Kevin Kinyon Show @KinyonNewsNet]

Prayers to our friends in Ukraine and the world. ⁦@KinyonNewsNet⁩

[Noelle Shipley @msship]

We will be.
Waiting for the light arisen
To flood inside the prison.
And in that time kind words
Alone will teach us,
No bitterness will reach us. NM