Les Sinclair

Tour Guide| Roundabout Shetland
@roundaboutshetland
Islander, historian, comedian, poet

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

@Nicolascole77 Looks good

[Dara Ó Briain @daraobriain]

Christ. 50. Jesus wept.

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

Get it free: The Digital Marketing Strategy Ebook Freebie https://t.co/ByR1ySNoTO via @StackSocial

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

In a survey, Abba's Dancing Queen is named best song to dance around the kitchen to. The best Abba song for going into pubs once they reopen is Gimme Gimme Gimme.

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

France has accused the UK of blackmail over Covid vaccine exports. The UK government says it’ll forget the accusation if the French leave £25 billion in a paper bag behind a washbasin in the Eurostar terminal.

[Bonnie & Clydeside @BandC_Comedy]

The government asked us to make this video now that everyone is out and about again. This is very serious and should be taken very seriously. Thank you.

#coronavirus #SocialDistance #HelloStranger

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

Animal welfare charities have said that shelters are at capacity with unwanted lockdown pets. Boris Johnson should've realised that Keir Starmer was not just for Christmas.

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

The UK Government has announced that the British Army will cut its numbers by 10,000. The army will then be stationed in the UK Defence Secretary’s spare bedroom.

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

300 ships are stuck in a ‘traffic jam’ as the Suez Canal is blocked by a giant container ship. Beggars are earning fortunes as they wash the thousands of windows and portholes on the ships.

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

I entered to win a chance to travel to Sicily @TourRadar and Sicily Activities! Enter now! #gotouring https://t.co/p4CGgJ6a9a

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

An Edinburgh woman bit off a man’s tongue in a street brawl before a seagull swept down and ate it. A lawyer for the seagull said his client was starving and, since the beginning of the pandemic, had been unable to have its normal diet of chips and cast-off kebabs.

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

The Perseverance Rover continues its mission on Mars. As yet, NASA has had no luck in finding Keir Starmer’s backbone.

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

In Nashville, an 8-year-old border collie named Lulu has inherited $5 million in her owner's will. However, it is being contested by her puppies’ lawyers.

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

An orgy involving 81 people was recently raided by French police for breaking social distancing rules. When asking for photo ID, police were happy to accept dick pics.

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

My followers are in UK.(92%), USA(3%)
Get your free map https://t.co/VsJswayP5q

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

A dinosaur footprint was recently found by a four year old girl on a Welsh beach. Police are concerned for the welfare of a one-legged Velociraptor.

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

A Canadian man has eaten the world's hottest chili peppers in a record time. The fire department says a full recovery is expected of his anus.

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

George Clooney recently helped Eddie Izzard complete a 31-day marathon challenge. Izzard said that it still felt shorter than watching Clooney’s The Midnight Sky movie.

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

Actor Pierce Brosnan is selling prints of his pop-art inspired ‘Earplugs’ painting. It’s hoped that these will include real earplugs for us to wear when he sings in the “Mamma Mia” movie. https://t.co/5t591YKC71

[Les Sinclair @muckleviking]

On his recent visit to Scotland, UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson, called for the whole country to unite and to “come together”. His partner suggests that he’d better brush up his foreplay technique then.