Andrew Murdoch

'inspirational quote' - someone smart

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

@Eilish2018 @meganflora98 You're welcome to name your child after me, Andrew is a pretty god damn good name

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

@meganflora98 @sofieuygun @chloe_stx This'll be the name of your firstborn right? Pretty sure you lost a bet to have your firstborn named after me at some point

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

I was today years old when I realised that a hatchback is called a hatchback because the boot opens like a hatch

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

@chloe_stx You're a vampire I don't need any more convincing

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

@chloe_stx Okay

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

Remember high fives? Fist bumps? They were great can we have them back?

[Hugh Laurie @hughlaurie]

Calls to UK Domestic Abuse Helplines have more than doubled since the lockdown. Victims should know that if they are in danger, they can dial 999, then press 55 and remain silent. Police will know that the caller is in danger and cannot speak. Spread this wide.

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

I would like it to be known that I am not tall I am just vertically thicc

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

I think I just witnessed someone use their hazards to signal that they were going straight on and it's strange feeling so shocked and disappointed by a complete stranger

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

@owenglazzby Clearly your puns are taking you to new heights of fame

[SammyJ @Sam_L_Johnstone]

Dumfries is long overdue an Asda

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

@meganflora98 Thanks

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

@meganflora98 @chloe_stx Yeh nope

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

@chloe_stx @meganflora98 The real dictionary disagrees 🧐

[clo @chloe_stx]

I’m gonna block Megan. Her love island memes are incessive

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

@owenglazzby They're underappreciated but they're not unappreciated

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

@meganflora98 As usual 🙄

[Andrew Murdoch @murdocci]

@chloe_stx @meganflora98 I think she misspelt Stewart x