pat murphy

becomes easily distracte...oh look, a bird.

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@Humanare40 They should just kiss already

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@Craig24909898 They’re really gonna miss you.

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

Giants game so bad the ref is doing yoga on the field

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@CraigHoffman11 Talk to us when you can memorize where the clit is.

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@ginisimov this is the way.

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

I can now name every county in Georgia, Nevada, Pennsylvania, and Arizona.

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

Who else is getting lit for part 2 of the season finale of American Shitstorm 2020?

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@Tumppi28 @DanPesa @IanSeggie @RangersMSGN ‘94 was 80 years ago?

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@TomBrady Poolhall Junkies, great movie.

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

NO SPOILERS BUT FUCK THIS SHOW #GameofThrones

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@JeffPassan What’s another million to a millionaire? @MLB should make it so that the $1mil goes to the charity of Home Run Derby winner’s choice.

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@LrgMargeSentYa Oh it can definitely be.

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

Juju Smith-Schuster owners when that fumble just cost them the ‘ship.

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@RLEsports fix your stream, the sound is broke

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@itskelseyjordan

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@missabs25 were you watching Betelgeuse too?

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@DuckFanAccount Drunk driving is bad, it ruins your buzz. I’d rather drive on cocaine

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@GOOKCITY @DuckFanAccount dis you?

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@carolynette07 the clicking noise is very soothing

[pat murphy @MurfnTurf]

@missabs25 Maxwell the gentleman