My Uber Driver

I tweet things people say about their drivers. By @hmason.

[iLuffhomer @iluffhomer]

This is my first uber driver in months who isn't texting while driving.

[k @QUEENKElRY]

My uber driver turned a 10 min drive into a 30 mins one 🙄

[hgalv @HANGALVIN]

My uber driver asked me if I was a clairvoyant

[Evil Con Carne @SemajInebriated]

My uber driver said fuck my life he's doing 45 in a 30 blowing by yellow lights and fuckin with the radio....5 stars

[sofi 🎠 @thensofisaidd]

this really nice crackhead man closed my uber door and told the uber driver that we are VIP ladies from a YouTube show and that is the energy I need in my life always and forever :’) @michelt_

[KAYLAAA💋 @Kaylaalsina]

My uber driver found me on ig

[Jay Vibez @JayVibez_]

Boyyy my uber driver trying to kill me like chill out Gurdeep

[ayyy peanut butter cups !!!! @JULES2SPiCY]

my 2k goes out to the only good song ever written , and to the uber driver i made friends with last night

[eric curtin @dubstep4dads]

my uber driver wylin

[adam l'something @lheureuxadam]

My uber driver last night played kendrick, logic, and raw thoughts 3 by @ChrisWebby and just know that he got 5 stars and an $8 tip

[BRENDA @_Br3nd3w]

My uber driver: you will het your over priced coffee soon
Me: ok
Uber driver: you have arrived to your over priced coffee
Me: thanks didn’t think I’d make it this far with out it

[Cass @cmondesousa]

My uber driver is playing old timey music I feel like I'm in fallout

[Monique @WanderlustMyWay]

My uber driver just told me I’m so quiet like....do ppl just chat up drivers?
I can’t with the small talk 😩

[Patricia Cornmaze @oohweehuman]

@FLYBL0WN my uber driver said the exact same thing

[Patrick Bet-David @patrickbetdavid]

An uber driver asked my Dad why he still works at 76 years old.

Here’s my Dad’s response “What do you want me to do? Die? I still have my own dreams? I still want to see my dreams come true!”

Age means nothing.

My Paps is a “G”.