Nancy

🌧️ low days, heavy mood🥺
alone, low, still here 🌙 talking about depression and loneliness like a person, not a quote page.😥

[Pushkin @anyiam_daniel]

You can chase the bag and still refuse the version of yourself that has to lie, cut corners, or become hard to respect. The market pays for value. Your standards decide whether that money stays, compounds, or costs you more than it brought in

[Nancy @Nancy_leeey]

@Mbaisefinest I can see you're enjoying alone

[Royalty 👑🇨🇦 @Mbaisefinest]

How is ur day going?
What are you having for lunch
Come and join me 😍

[Patchris @DanisonPatience]

At 9:17pm, my phone rang.

Unknown number.

I almost ignored it, but something made me answer.

“Hello?”

A man’s voice said quietly, “Please, don’t tell my wife I called you.”

I sat up.
Don't tell my wife keh!

“Excuse me?”

He went silent for a few seconds, then said, “I think I made a terrible mistake.”

My heart started beating faster.

“Who are you?”

[♡ @_midesofly]

会社からかなり怪しいNDA（秘密保持契約）にサインするよう求められた。でも内容に納得できなかったから、まだサインしてない。

今日またサインを迫られて、

私：「サインする前に弁護士に確認してもらいます」

って言った。そしたらその1時間後に突然クビになった。まだ3ヶ月の試用期間中で、会社が言う解雇理由は「売上不足」。でも正直、それが本当の理由だとは全く思ってない。弁護士に相談すると言ったからクビにされたんだと思ってる。

[Nancy @Nancy_leeey]

I can want someone and still get through a night by myself. those aren’t opposites. tonight it’s a podcast and the light on. that’s the company I’ve got.

[Nancy @Nancy_leeey]

The loneliest part of depression isn't being alone. It's smiling in a room full of people and still feeling invisible.

[Nancy @Nancy_leeey]

I can want someone and still get through a night by myself. those aren’t opposites. tonight it’s a podcast and the light on. that’s the company I’ve got.

[Nancy @Nancy_leeey]

My sister drove two hours because I stopped answering. Same clothes from Monday. Curtains closed. One yogurt in the fridge.

She started the dishwasher. “Mom thinks you’re mad at her.”

“I’m not.”

“Then why did you say you were fine and ignore her for eleven days?”

She dried her hands. “Pharmacy says you picked up the prescription and never came back for the refill.”

The bottle was still full in the nightstand. I kept meaning to start it on a Monday.

“So do I tell Mom you’re sick, or that you just didn’t want to talk to any of us?”

I said, “Don’t tell her yet.”

She left the spare key on the counter.

[Nancy @Nancy_leeey]

My manager asked why I left lunch early. I said my stomach was off.

I sat in the car forty minutes with the engine off. Couldn’t get the seatbelt to click.

At home the cursor didn’t move for two hours. I kept refreshing Slack so the green dot stayed on.

My partner said, “Your boss emailed me. Three missed standups. She asked if everything’s okay at home.”

I hadn’t told him I’d been calling in sick. Or that I spent Tuesday under my desk because I couldn’t answer when someone said my name.

He didn’t raise his voice. “So which part am I supposed to believe?”

I still haven’t answered him.

[Patchris @DanisonPatience]

Mom had already built a house before she met my father.

There was really no need for my father to build another one immediately, so people advised them to start their lives in my mother’s house.

That was where they began their marriage.

Last year, my mother discovered that my father was cheating on her with his friend’s sister. The woman was pregnant for him.

My mother was devastated. She threw my father out of the house and filed for divorce.

My father refused to give up on the marriage. He kept pleading with her, telling her he was sorry and asking her to take him back.

I was angry with him too. After listening to both my parents, I knew my father was wrong.

But he was still my father.

So I pleaded with my mother to give him another chance.

During that period, the woman gave birth and left the baby with my father.

My father would visit my mother in her office with the baby.

Seeing him come with the child, apologising and begging for his marriage, gradually softened my mother.

.

[𝒰𝓃𝓂𝒶𝓈𝓀 @unmaskmind]

the rate at which she’s gaining wright these days is ridiculous.

[Pushkin @anyiam_daniel]

Reassurance is not kindness. It is how anxiety stays employed.

[Patchris @DanisonPatience]

My mother-in-law organised a ladies-only Mother’s Day dinner.

It was just her, her other daughter, another daughter-in-law and me.

I had recently suffered another miscarriage, and infertility had already become a painful subject in my life. Still, I attended because I genuinely hoped the evening would help me feel closer to the family.

We ordered food, drinks and everything we needed.

Just as we were about to eat, a woman I had never seen before walked in.

My mother-in-law looked at me and said she wanted us to discuss something important.

Then she started begging the other women to convince me to allow my husband to impregnate this woman.

She said she only wanted my husband to have a child and that the woman was willing to carry his baby.

I sat there listening to everyone discuss my marriage as though I wasn't even in the room.

Then something in me broke.

[Pushkin @anyiam_daniel]

The quiet version of OCD is the one nobody sees. Mental reviewing, confessing in your head, replaying a moment until it feels “right.” No one claps for that.

[Nancy @Nancy_leeey]

I found his phone in the couch two days later. Dead. I charged it because I thought he’d come back for it.

Last message from his mom, sent the morning he showed up: “You can’t keep doing this every time it gets quiet. Your sister is tired too.”

Below that, unsent drafts to me.

“If she wants me gone just say it.”

“I can hear you guys through the wall. I’ll leave earlier.”

“Don’t tell her I was awake.”

He still hasn’t asked for the phone. I haven’t texted the number he used to use.

[Nancy @Nancy_leeey]

My cousin asked if he could crash for a week. Said his roommate situation got weird and he just needed a quiet place to sleep.

He showed up with one bag and groceries. Cooked every night. Took the trash out before I asked. Sat on the far end of the couch with headphones in so he “wouldn’t bother” anyone.

By week three my girlfriend stopped eating dinner with us. She started getting dressed in the bathroom.

I told him Friday that he needed a plan by the end of the month. He said, “Yeah. Of course. I’ve already been looking.”

Sunday his bag was gone. Key on the counter. Dishes done.

[Ella @EllasArchive1]

I agreed to babysit my neighbor’s son for $100, and within twenty minutes, the boy told me I needed to hide before his father came home.

I laughed.

“I’m the adult here.”

He looked completely serious.

“No. You don’t understand.”

I put down my phone.

“Understand what?”

He whispered:

“My dad thinks you’re someone else.”

I frowned.

“What does that mean?”

He pointed toward the front window.

“Every woman who comes here leaves before he gets home.”

I stared at him.

“Why?”

He shrugged.

“He says they’re friends.”

Then he looked at the clock.

“Usually, they leave before 8:30.”

I laughed.

“Your dad has a lot of friends?”

He shook his head.

“No. That’s why I think you should hide.”

At 8:24 p.m., we heard a car pull into the driveway.

The boy grabbed my hand.

“Too late.”

[Nancy @Nancy_leeey]

The loneliest part of depression isn't being alone. It's smiling in a room full of people and still feeling invisible.

[Nancy @Nancy_leeey]

@Pitchside_CF You enjoyed being the person he looked for, and now the idea of someone else getting that version of him stings even if you don’t want the relationship