name goes here

The anonymous Twitter account of a female editor at a national nonprofit. World's slowest runner. Wannabe athlete. Curmudgeon. Childfree advocate.

[Jack O’Brien @JackPhillyRE]

I think we should charge old people extra property tax

[the thicc husband & father @lukeisamazing]

haven’t seen America this thoroughly embarrassed on the world stage since we lost that war we started with Iran like 3 weeks ago

[Kyle Neubeck @KyleNeubeck]

They’re calling it the most hooper pilled roster in history

[scary lawyerguy @scarylawyerguy]

It turns out the great egg price increase that helped topple Joe Biden's presidency was <checks notes> due to an alleged conspiracy among egg producers to artificially increase prices and the coverage of that fact is a blink-and-you-miss-it story on the NYT website 🙃

[Grace Panetta @grace_panetta]

Balogun can play on Monday if Mike Pence has the courage

[one dozen rats at a keyboard @PanasonicDX4500]

recanting all my Jaylen Brown slander now that he’s a Sixer

[Keith McMillan @D3Keith]

Philly traded a 29-year-old disgruntled and possibly misunderstood Brown in the prime of his career to New England, and Boston sent one right back.

[FOX Sports @FOXSports]

Mauricio Pochettino singing "Take Me Home, Country Roads" 🇺🇸

@USMNT

[Shams Charania @ShamsCharania]

BLOCKBUSTER: The Boston Celtics have agreed to trade Jaylen Brown to the Philadelphia 76ers for Paul George, two first-round picks and two second-round picks, sources tell ESPN.

[vo @vanillaopinions]

having juneteenth off now is the best legacy of woke 1.0

[Herb Lawrence @Ecnerwal23]

Punking Blake Treinen during Pride Month is my favorite thing

[claire de lune @ClaireMPLS]

lol, lmao even

[Zoo With Roy @zoowithroy]

Dude there are only like 37 NHL coaches and they all just rotate through teams every couple years

[Wiffleball @CorkballOne]

Should say “Mouth Always Open”

[Katie @KayTeeeOh]

When Trump shuts down midtown:

[C O U R T N E Y @icourtneycries]

yeah, sex is great and all but have you heard an entire arena boo a shitty president with their whole chest?

[Rodger Sherman @rodger]

When somebody who has committed especially heinous crimes is in the building

[name goes here @nepa_2_philly]

Stacey King died?! WTF