Allison Chains

Writer/artist, bastard child since '86, zombie slayer and firecracker. Member of Jean-Claude Van Band (vocals... and everything else....)

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

Just a couple of blue-eyed nags!

[BadMummy @WineMummy]

Your dad is my favorite motherfucker.

[Ⓜ️isterD @MisterD78UK]

Friend: so we're planning a night out
Me: yeah sorry I can't make it
Friend: I haven't said when it is yet
Me: Shit, damn, can we start this again?

[Ｗ 𝗜 𝗦 𝗘 𝗖 𝗢 𝗡 𝗡 𝗘 𝗖 𝗧 𝗢 𝗥 ™ 💬 @wiseconnector]

The strongest people I know aren't the ones who never make mistakes.

They're the ones willing to own them.

Accountability earns more respect than perfection ever will.

[J.K. Rowling @jk_rowling]

Today I discovered not only that there is such a thing as a quokka but also that my whole life I've been missing a quokka.

[Ⓜ️isterD @MisterD78UK]

Don't say "bear with me"... unless there's actually a bear with you, you look stupid and no one likes a liar

[Cherry Pie with a Hat @cherry_hat]

I feel like Twitter used to be nakeder

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

I hope that if a Girl Scout were to go to Bill Gates’ house, Alexa’s voice would alert Bill and threaten said Girl Scout, while massive turrets would rise from the rooftops aimed at the small child, while asking her for her objective in entering Mr. Gates’ threshold or ELSE!!!

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

@JPLFR80 Hahaha!!! ICQ guy wins.

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

I hate when my spaghettios to meatballs ratio is off….

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

Another episode of “Stoned Thoughts”!

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

This is my sketchbook. I love this tree.

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

So proud today! Thank you to God, my girls in my sober house, my family, my friends and lastly to myself because I can’t give away something that I don’t have. Your relationship with yourself is so important and I’m learning that I cannot care for anyone if I don’t care about me.

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

30 days sober!!! Thank you, God. I thought you forgot about me, but you were always there helping me hold on when I had already given up… I’m so grateful for every day on this Earth. I no longer have to suffer… today I am free of drugs and alcohol. Today I’m living a good life.

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

Happy to be here at an N.A. meeting tonight. 24 days sober! Thank you God for helping me survive the last 6 months… they were the darkest days of my life but it got me here. No regrets. I love my life today and it does get better… I’m so grateful for this 2nd chance.

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

21 days sober! I’m so grateful to be alive today. I almost didn’t make it. Fentanyl and crystal meth almost did me in… but (like a phoenix) I’m FIREPROOF, baby! 🐦‍🔥

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

So Siri texted my sister “let’s get naked.” Instead of “let’s get baked.” And it took me all day to figure out why she never said anything…

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

Sometimes there’s a comment that makes your whole year… lol

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

You go to bed!

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

I’m still rocking the half updo! You know you missed it, ladies!

[Allison Chains @nessydyer]

Love that I can put my hair up, but I don’t love how hard it is to keep it from getting all tangled up in the back while I’m sleeping… I think I’m too old to rock the short ‘dos I used to. Guess I’m gonna have to start (gulp!) brushing my hair!