Drew Sikkink

quit? don’t quit. noodles? don’t noodles.

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

When people ask why I’m leaving early or can’t make an event I tell them “gotta go, the people of Pyongyang need me”

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

benches should be portals to other benches

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

there’s so much bamboo in America, bring the pandas

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

im done with texting lmk if you want to chat and ill share a google doc with you

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

I lost some friends off this one ngl

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

Don’t put the horse and the ox in the cart. One, or both, should be before the cart otherwise the cart will be impossible to move.

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

Life’s been all downhill since they changed the recommended tooth brushing time to an entire 90 seconds

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

If it’s my fault, I get a malt (milkshake)

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

Isn’t it funny how we have a word for “pots” AND a word for “pans”? I feel like we could’ve managed with just using one of the two words to describe both kitchenware but I suppose it can be a helpful distinction.

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

Bro like what even the heck are vegetables?? What is broccoli? Just like ... plants that taste better than other plants?

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

Growing up is realizing oven mitts are nothing more than giant cotton gloves. No special anti-heat magic. Just really thick towels for your hands.

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

If you’re ever offered a choice between an electric toothbrush and a normal toothbrush always go with the electric one because even if you don’t have a charger, you can use it as a normal toothbrush after the battery is out

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

Aye wait a minute

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

Man this virus been around awhile but I still don’t know anyone who’s actually had it

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

Maybe the real coronavirus was inside us all along :)

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

You might never be the smartest, most attractive, funniest person in the room but you can always be the nicest

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

Looking to join a large, boisterous Italian family. Willing to marry in. Involvement in organized crime preferred but not required.

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

Something I heard today: trust is earned in drops and lost in buckets

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

@JoeyPercoco1

[Drew Sikkink @newhannes]

When people ask how many people go to my school I just tell them we have one toaster for the entire student body