Nick Kloska

Father. Lifeguard. Hufflepuff. #feelthebern. Celibate. Can’t swim. Facts don’t care about your feelings. Thoughts aren’t my own.

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

Yes I’m a writer. No I’m actually not. We exist.

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

When it’s an escalator but for the floor… ❤️ that

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

Stuart Little 2: Stuart Big

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

It's literally sooo mean that they would name him Gary OldMan????

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

There comes a certain age when you have to accept that tea just tastes like that

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

Kung Fu Panda 4. Let that sink in.

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

Taylor Swift is going to be 48 soon 💔

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

Randomsauce son or Awkward Turtle daughter

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

Just got diagnosed with having delusions of grandeur

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

Taylor Swift is going to be 50 soon 💔

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

You’re telling me this mistletoe is hung???

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

I love being on Twitter like “fuck the system, we’re all robots” then going to work like “can I get you an extra sprinkle of cinnamon in your latte, sir?”

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

GUYS AUGUSTUS WATERS DIES???????

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

I have to rash this b (short for ration this beer)

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

Saying “we needed this” after paying for a $49 Uber and $30 per drink

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

My great grandmother (pictured) served as a medic nurse in Vietnam. We recently came across her official headshot. She kindly requested that I post to see if there are any TRUE patriots willing to rt and pay their respects

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

White people love to “do the” instead of “have the” at restaurants

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

I’m the nepo baby of the northern Indiana recreational vehicle (RV) sales industry

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

DNC emails be like: “Nick 👋🏼, it’s second Gentlemen Doug👉🏼👈🏼 and I’m tewwified🥺. I will literally KILL MYSELF and everyone you love if you don’t pledge $5/month to re-elect my best buddy Joe and my wife.”

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

@MacyMateer Going to have to figure out how to read first but I’ll call you up once I’m finished 👍🏻

[Nick Kloska @nickkloska]

Your dreams won’t work till you do ✍🏼