Passive suicidal ideation is when you have no intention of hurting yourself, but deep down, you wouldn't mind if you fell asleep tonight and never woke up. You’re not actively trying to die; you’re just so tired of living that being gone feels easier.
It hurts to be made out to be a bad person when you know how many times you stopped thinking about yourself to prioritize the well,being of others. It's true that many people only see what you didn't do, but they forget all the times you were there when no one else was.