no one talks about how exhausting it is to be observant. how u break your own heart a little every day from the tiny details u involuntarily pick up, and u just wanna tell yourself that none of it is real, but it's also u who's telling u that it is. so how do u trust yourself?
me reminding myself that the northern lights will continue to exist and that i can go to see them at another time of my choosing and make a whole trip of it if i would like