nisha graves

math nerd turned hair artist. kink enthusiast. brown girl magic. bigender and queer AF. sometimes funny, but mostly just a really kind alien.

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

Another phrase I’ve been rolling around in my head is “unearned closeness” instead of “lovebombing”. There’s nothing loving about manipulation - so why even use that word? For me, “unearned closeness” is a perfectly succinct description of that tactic.

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

I’ve been using the phrase “weaponized masculinity” instead of “toxic masculinity”.

Why? Bc there’s nothing inherently toxic about masculinity (or femininity) - and children shouldn’t grow up thinking there’s something “toxic” about their natural gender expression.

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

Words are spells. I think about this a lot. Certain phrasings can be rather inaccurate and carry a history of negative energy. Sometimes changing the way we speak about things changes the way we think and behavior.

Here’s two that have been rattling around in my head all year:

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

@RayComplex Absolutely

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

@PhilanthropyGal listening to WAC & @GuysWeFcked the past few weeks - and I think you should look into aromanticism. We’re the inverse of aces-dig sex, but on a spectrum b/w grayromantic or romance repulsed & don’t buy into hierarchical relationships like alloromantics💚🤍🖤

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

Fitzgerald: "the test of a first rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposing ideas in your head at the same time, and still retain the ability to function".....

Me: w/ that logic, childhood trauma survivors w/ people-pleasing disease must be the SMARTEST FKRS around.

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

Just posted a photo @ Humboldt Park https://t.co/H0KhfDu0zZ

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

Just posted a photo @ Chicago, Illinois https://t.co/CHx0TNbdTf

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

@cristabell @joederosacomedy @PhilanthropyGal LMAO I thought that immediately even before I knew he left, but that’s just me making assumptions based on knowing less than 1% of her life 😂 so yeah, maybe the latter

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

I’m so sad @joederosacomedy left the without a country podcast with @PhilanthropyGal. I’m a huge GWF fan, but Joe was one of my college crushes - back when I used to secretly watch the Red Eye at my super liberal school.

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

Just posted a photo @ Graceland Cemetery & Arboretum https://t.co/bDOWOnkuuV

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

Just posted a photo @ Graceland Cemetery & Arboretum https://t.co/f1wCZ2LoI7

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

Just posted a photo @ Graceland Cemetery & Arboretum https://t.co/ek9ejoBYD6

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

😈MAJOR FIRE ZADDY VIBES😈 @ Chicago, Illinois https://t.co/6TLNfADeMq

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

@EricLabRat I’m... Kira knows all 27 of her names and purrs happily if I incorporate all of them into a catchy song of praise.

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

Man, I’ve done so much work in therapy working on my attachment styles that I’m not even attracted to Spike from Buffy anymore...

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

My cat’s claws turned me into a pirate just in time for Halloween (and the next week or so)... 🙄😒 Bless her heart - she knows I like to REALLY commit to my LQQKS. 😉 @ Chicago, Illinois https://t.co/r6xD4ZqWke

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

If a bathtub is a water coffin - my hammock is an air coffin.

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

Fuck, I’ve had exes that went off and BECAME a knock off version of me. #lesbianproblems

[nisha graves @nishathegraves]

Getting cruised at 12:30am is such a different feeling than getting cruised at 5am.