that vegan bish 🌱

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

accidentally hurting yourself??”… to which I responded “that’s where this happened to me!”… he just sighed and shook his head while proceeding to find and hand me the thc vape #truestory #motherhood #SAHMlife

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

Got a 3rd degree burn from eating a pizza roll while my daughter was sitting on me… my brain didn’t register that they were JUST cooked, so I grabbed one and haphazardly bit into the middle… squirting almost all the filling onto my chest, which hurt like hell but my daughter

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

at my chest and say “how the heck did the heat wipe off my [natural] tan?” … my partner leaned in to inspect my chest and says “that’s a 3rd degree burn”, he then face palms while shaking his head and says “can you please just go lay in the bed where you’re safe from

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

I say “suck my dick” wayyy too much for a person who does not have one… but I do have a dildo you can suck 😜

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

Being a new mom is a WILD experience… I really need some mom friends to talk to about this shit with!!! But how tf do grown adults make friends??? I’m soo awkward!!! Fml 🤦🏽‍♀️

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

@diolinera Speaking from experience, that last color is called baby poop

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

My baby daddy’s green flag is that he got a ring to wear when he’s out without me so he doesn’t get hit on by random women because he’s “taken”

[𝗱𝗮𝗻𝗻𝘆🫧💚 @beyoncegarden]

OH SHE SPILLED😭😭😭

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

I’m so grateful to be starting this new year with the loml and my person 🥰💜😍

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

27 years on this earth and I still have no idea how to take compliments, I get so awkward and weird

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

I was told by someone that if they had to pick a person who they thought was an alien pretending to be human they would choose me … and honestly I didn’t know how to take it at that moment, and I’m still struggling to understand how I feel about it now

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

I’ve decided that my new mantra for life is “if he wanted to he would and if he won’t someone will” .. I will not be accepting anything other than absolute princess treatment from now on 💅🏽

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

Just wish I had someone in my life that i trusted enough to cuddle with

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

All my smart ex’s know that the easiest way to lock me down is to randomly bring me food and sentimental little gifts

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

I lowkey wish I could go on Love is Blind and find the loml cuz this dating app shit is literal hell and I’m WAY too introverted to meet someone in real life… ion leave my home other than for work

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

I will never understand why men think that “you look like fun” is a good first message for dating apps

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

Welp I clearly shouldn’t be drinking on my medication but here we are again… 7am on my Sunday and I’m too sober to deal with my thoughts so time to numb that shit and let future Nadia deal with the consequences

[that vegan bish 🌱 @nljluv]

I’ve just watched wayy too much Catfish and true crime docs to trust these dating apps… I’m convinced I’ll be permanently single unless I somehow meet my person at work which would be weird af to me