Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist

Proctologist 🍑 Proud father of 3. 👨‍👨‍👧‍👦 Basque 🤝 Eskaldunak. Got the call from Mikel 💪 💪 Estoy listo empezar desalojando cabezas desde culos! #COYG

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

So thankful for the opportunity, @m8arteta and @Arsenal! Looking forward to this collaboration! ¡Vamos claro! #AFC #GodsWork #PartoftheProcess

[Win the Therapy Dog @Win4theWin_]

Okay, sorry that wasn't a new transfer signing, but maybe this will excite you.
HERE WE GO!🚨🚨BREAKING NEWS🚨🚨@Arsenal and @m8arteta complete BRILLIANT signing of new TEAM PROCTOLOGIST @No2Proctologist! Signing to join up on USA tour to help "dislodge heads" #transfernews #COYG

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@IqMikelo @Cubanjamal11 Ah right yes, the old "let someone leave and not replace them" plan. Great suggestion from the Queen of Twats. Gold star for you.

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@theChuck0 @ThfcdoylieV4 Xabi Alonso is the player and manager Mikey wished he became. Though tbf while I don't rate Ramsdale he is a sight better than Almunia or Fabianski. Personally would not be bothered if both Raya and Ramsdale left, two above-avg keepers not really world-class.

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@Gunnersc0m Yesterday's Mustafi, Sokatris & Holding are today's Kylie, Georgina and Fabiana. Plugging different leaks in a sinking ship.

"Be grateful how far we've come" -- we've gone full circle multiple times achieving nothing. Grateful for what, bottling four league titles in 20 years?🤡

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@pythaginboots @AFTVMedia Which stage of #TheProcess is redeveloping Kylie? 😂 paid 65m to redevelop "love of the game" absolute bundle of stick mediocrity peddling nonsense this is. What an absolute joke & disgrace of an existence you have. Go piss off and support Wimbledon or Barnet. #ArtetasexualsOut

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@rnartineIli @AFTVMedia

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

The only stats of relevance:

0⃣league titles won
4⃣league titles bottled
3⃣@m8arteta has bottled in an Arsenal capacity

1000 relatively meaningless goals led to nothing but a few FA Cups. But the bundle of sticks Artetasexuals say it's no problem, what's a league title anyhow..

[Arsenal @Arsenal]

1️⃣0️⃣0️⃣0️⃣ goals
4️⃣7️⃣4️⃣ matches
9️⃣9️⃣ different goalscorers

📊 Discover all the stats behind our Emirates Stadium milestone 👇

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@Arsenal 0⃣ league titles won
4⃣ league titles bottled
3⃣ league titles @m8arteta has bottled in an Arsenal capacity

But no worry we're allergic to major honours. Thanks for getting us back to 2013/14 Mikey -- it's time to go. #ArtetaOut #ArtetasexualsOut

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@AFTVMedia 🗑

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@Artetatet @kaihavertz29 @FrelloJorginho @FabioViera @m8arteta & save the waterworks for your therapist. Next time you visit, discuss how pathetic & immaterial your existence is dedicating your Twitter handle to Mikey 🤡 glorifying an arrogant overrated passion merchant that's bottled 3 league titles in an Arsenal capacity.

Well done lad.

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

Let Mikey pursue his true dreams as a fashion runway model or headmaster of his inaugural Fraudteta School of the Performing Arts or sponsor the newest drops of Just for Men's hair dye.

Just end this nightmare already. Please.

#ArtetaOut #ArtetasexualsOut #SilverwareOrSack

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@Artetatet @kaihavertz29 @FrelloJorginho @FabioViera @m8arteta Because I'm fucking your mom every day and twice on Sunday while living in your pea-sized mind rent-free. Imagine getting aggravated by actual fans with actual standards for the elite level this club attests to be at.

Bit of a disgrace aren't ya, ya generic Artetasexual 🤔

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@niipronk0072 @kaihavertz29 @FrelloJorginho @FabioViera @m8arteta @Arsenal

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@niipronk0072 @kaihavertz29 @FrelloJorginho @FabioViera @m8arteta @Arsenal Ooh, cue the word salad waterworks response ���� you're such a big boy!

I've had my own practice for 27 yrs prior joining the Osakidetza-Basque Health Service as a colorectal surgeon. You know nothing about everything. Take a lap & maybe halfway you'll pick up something valuable.

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@Cubanjamal11 I'd like Tchouameni but it's not realistic. I like Fofana from Monaco or Thuram at Nice.
But rather play Rice in his natural holding mid role and get a proper 8 -- or move Martin into the 8 role and get a proper 10 instead.

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@kendallrowanx and I can't stand how much this fraud @m8arteta & the padded room + straitjacket candidate Artetasexuals have brought my club back into the banter era. Bottling four league titles in 20 years wasn't bad enough, let's bring in a therapy dog @Win4theWin_ to console the fanbase.

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@kendallrowanx Admittedly he is an easy mark to make fun of, like waffling about 43000 formations or comparing Kylie to his wife or any other of his imaginative nonsense.

Harsh reality is Xabi Alonso was the player (and manager) Mikey Fraudteta wished he became 😂
Pyrite in a shop of gold.

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@GreevilleE There's no need to get philosophical here, he's just a proven league flop. They exist, we've seen it time and again. Some players aren't cut out for the league.
It's not that hard to grasp (of course, unless you're as arrogant as @m8arteta or as deluded as the Artetasexuals)

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@Gooner_Mousse Aren't you the doorman from the fish fry festival last summer? Mollycoddled pansies w/ fragile ears & egos as yourself are a lost cause, an absolute disgrace to the badge, gleefully dragging it into banter territory.
No amt of tears can bail you out of reality. #ArtetasexualsOut

[Dr. Seymour Butts, Arsenal FC Proctologist @No2Proctologist]

@niipronk0072 @kaihavertz29 @FrelloJorginho @FabioViera @m8arteta Yeah we get it: Mikey is stubborn, Artetasexuals are mollycoddled pansies w/ no standards, & if ya don't like it too bad
You're an absolute disgrace dragging @Arsenal through the mud embracing players & staff that are wickedly underpar for the level of this club. No dignity. #sad