Nola Allinger

why have friends when you can have fans she, her, hers

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

extremely niche interest overlap BUT

San Antonio women is to Charles Barkley as Emilia Perez is to @katya_zamo

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

the amount of content Austin Butler’s Elvis voice and all around cringe behavior must be giving Vanessa’s gt is astounding to think about. and I think that’s beautiful.

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

okay but how many silk button downs can Zara even sell it’s just gluttonous at this point

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

mastermind is for all of us who would find our crush on snap maps and then ~spontaneously~ run in to them later that night (me)

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

okay hear me out, Dear John (Taylor’s Version) ft JESSICA SIMPSON

THE REDEMPTION CAN YOU IMAGINE

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

“Daemyra hive, we eating!!!” but this is the s*x scene #hotd

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

okay but tight end really is a hot girl position. it’s truly in the name that you are that bitch™

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

oh my favorite hobby? listening to my own voice memos I send my friends

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

okay not that I can afford anything from Hermes but my god complex has convinced me that the SA would offer me a Birkin based on my personality alone

[Homo Honey @DixPeyton]

when I text you “🤸🏻‍♀️” it means

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

too much time between deciding on my hungover fixation meal and making it and now the very idea of it disgusts me and every bite is agony

[Chanté @ChantayyJayy]

I really hate this need to justify abortion because of r*pe and incest. They’re obviously hugely valid and understandable reasons but “I simply don’t want to be a parent” is reason enough. Having autonomy over your own body is reason enough.

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

anytime I wonder where my weird body image comes from I remember every magazine cover in my formative years had insert thin, white, blonde starlet on the cover with headlines like “X balloons up to a whopping 115 pounds. should she just k*ll herself?”

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

if there’s one thing men don’t understand, it’s little treat culture. what do you mean you worked a full day and get yourself a latte? no mid day pick me up soda? no late afternoon nap? or late night impulse buy new highlighter? truly wtf

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

okay but if spending money is bad then explain THIS

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

wait, weren’t y’all prolifers just applauding a man being sentenced to death in Oklahoma last week?

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

my toxic trait is I’m convinced I can get anyone to like me. your grumpy neighbor that has literally never gotten along with anyone or even smiled? give me an hour with him at a Luby’s and I bet we’ll leave the best of friends

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

nothing tells me more about a person than if you like bloody Mary’s or not. “You’re basically just drinking ketchup and vodka” omfg GROW UP

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

and it’s so crazy but we are actually the good guys in all of them !!

[Sam Taggart @samttaggart]

School is like ok lemme get you up to speed on all the wars you missed before you go to your job forever

[Nola Allinger @nolaallinger]

rip Charles Darwin, you would’ve loved watching ppl go through airport security 💕