into the blue

i'm iris (@jadevrisrezi) and this is where i put words that make me feel things! made with @gimmickbots.

[into the blue @normalebooks]

this bot now run on https://t.co/xQVTE9sK87

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feel free to ask for the source but bear in mind: i have bad taste, so it might be from danganronpa fanfiction or something.

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And I know that none of this will matter in the long run, but I know a sound is still a sound around no one! And while I'm in this body, I want somebody to want, and I want what I want, and I want you to love me!

[into the blue @normalebooks]

Ummm. I'd like to tell you something. The nurse told me to think of a happy memory before surgery, and I thought of you. I'm sure you could have guessed that though. I just really wanted to tell you about it. Have you had any surgery recently? Did you think of me too?

[into the blue @normalebooks]

i thought about a lot of things when i was in surgery. i thought about arctic winds blowing down from the north and i thought about melting ice caps and rising sea lines. i thought about each and every message in a bottle that no one finds, and i woke up after surgery crying

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Take my sad thanks for this: you do not cause my sickness. And I don't cause yours.

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It takes all of my restraint, not climbing in your cranium to see the way the furniture's arranged. Scratching at the door, they're gonna call security so I can't creep around here anymore.

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You aren't happy. You're a hilarious trainwreck combined with a sad punchline, and I'm ashamed to share an identity with you.

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- Know what I think?
- Don't wanna hear it.
- You like being there to rescue me. You like it when I'm a mess, because it makes you feel good about yourself. Guess what? I never asked for that.
- You ask all the time. You have never not been asking me to rescue you.

[into the blue @normalebooks]

- Are you running away?
- Don’t worry about me anymore!
- Are you running away?! Weren’t we gonna have tea and laugh together in ten years?
- I’m sorry, Utena-sama. I’m so sorry.

[into the blue @normalebooks]

The only thing I could think about after I got too little sleep and cut my foot and had to bury a dead baby bird in the flower pot was you. You with your distance, you with your high ground. You never having to witness anything, always at a remove, you giving up responsibility.

[into the blue @normalebooks]

You know, I actually liked it when the captain talked about how heaven was on merit. As long as you do good things, maybe you can be good... Then they said we don't believe that anymore and it's what's in your heart that matters. Just when I think I got it right, they changed it.

[into the blue @normalebooks]

I'll walk with you into the blue.

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- BoJack?
- Yeah?
- Are we friends?
- Yeah. I mean... I think we are. Or I think we can be.
- Okay, then, as a friend, I'm asking you. Please don't leave me.

[into the blue @normalebooks]

I've practically devoted my life to certain memories, to the idea that two people can be meant to be with each other on some cosmic level, even if they always seem to get each other in trouble.

[into the blue @normalebooks]

- Are you running away?
- Don’t worry about me anymore!
- Are you running away?! Weren’t we gonna have tea and laugh together in ten years?
- I’m sorry, Utena-sama. I’m so sorry.

[into the blue @normalebooks]

I am breaking, I think. I may already be broken. I am repaired otherwise. I do not understand so much. She is pleased, and that is that which matters. I do not remember caring about her happiness so dearly. I do not remember caring about happiness.

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I wonder if you can refuse to inherit the world.

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You're still cosmic jailbait. The eternal victim. Undoing all the work we did, catching his crazy again.

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- A friend should bear his friend’s infirmities, but Brutus makes mine greater than they are.
- I do not, till you practice them on me.
- You love me not.
- I do not like your faults.
- A friendly eye could never see such faults.
- A flatterer’s would not.

[into the blue @normalebooks]

Everyone needs to hear someone say, “Nobody else will do. It has to be you.” sometime in their lives, even if it only happens once. As long as you can feel sure those words were sincere, you can live through anything, no matter how painful.
She’s seeking those words, too.

[into the blue @normalebooks]

I don't want to be this kind of animal anymore!