.•❥Panda

I just post content that pisses me off and should do the same for you!

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

Quick Question: How on earth do people make friends in this time? I remember when we was doing all that TBH, Rate and Date bs on Instagram lmao. That’s how I remember making friends! How do you do that shit now??

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

Little bit of TMI but hey whatever;
I’ve been constipated for 2 days. Finally got the fucker out. It’s the next day and my anus feels like it’s bruised as in if a man named “Big Terry” had his way with me in prison. It feels like I blew out my butthole. #saynotobackdoorsex

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!!! A new strain of Ebola?! I’ve been pissed off enough today and this one takes the cake man. If Jesus don’t hurry up and come take this muthafuckin planet off it’s hinges, ima unscrew myself from the wall cuz I can’t do this anymore! Strongest soldier my ass!

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

I hate when a fucking MAN tells me something is too much like cooking ground beef for rotel. “You don’t need that much ground beef to cook rotel”, YES TF I DO IF IM MAKING A BIG ASS FUCKING POT OF IT! See you would know that if you eat it BUT YOU DON’T CUZ UR PUSSY! Fuck out my face. Bought 2 blocks of family size velveta cheese, 3 fat ass cans of rotel. Don’t tell me how much fucking meat I need in something I cook on the reg bitch ass nigga. Go complain to ya momma about some bs not me and get tf out my kitchen. Now ion even wanna cook it no more and my brother gon be pissed he ain’t got no rotel with his baby shower meatballs and ima tell em why! PMTFO

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

I just took 4 Advils (200mg), 2 Advil pm’s (200mg) and a Hydrocodone (500mg) all for a swollen lymph node…. Am I cooked?? Did I just fuck myself?? OH and let’s not forget I hit my vape a few times too! If I don’t wake up, someone tell Kevin Hart he’s not funny and that I’ll suck off Johnny Depp for a free bag of chips.

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

Daily Confession:
Me, my Fiancé and our friends broke into our friend ex-boyfriend apartment, took all her stuff and her sons stuff from out of there but we had to leave him a gift before we left. We poured hot sauce in his fleshlight and put it back😄#sorrynotsorry .

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

I hate this dry ass shit. It sucks cuz I really like you but now you giving me the ick and I no longer wanna talk to you bruh. Just note, this yo fault fr man

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

Why is it that every dad is Math Wizz, but can’t spell or read for shit? I suck at math, I’m horrible at it. But I can spell and read my ass off. But I get yelled at when I can’t solve a Grade-SS+ NASA Space Math Equation but HE CAN?! I don’t get it.

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

I get you’re here to do your job. But when you come to someone’s house FIX YOUR FUCKING FACE BITCH. I COULD send this to your boss cause I already got 2 people in this apartment complex that said they have a problem with your bitch ass. Lemme catch you in front my door with an attitude again and I promise you I’ll open it and I hope you have that same attitude when I do. Bitches today are getting too fucking comfortable in the world.

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

Bro I hate living in an apartment bro. I’m sleep on the couch and I proceed to hear knocking at the door. So I shout “ONE MOMENT” like 2-3 times to this man. Any other time I do it they can hear me but this men must be fuckin new! So my fiance came from out of the room to come check. Mind you- we both sleep naked. (It’s our house ion wanna hear no bs about it). So babes walking to the door and this man OPENS OUR DOOR WITH A MAINTENANCE KEY! Now I know they have to have a key, that’s not news to me. But Ik this mf heard me screaming “ONE MOMENT” to him. The couch isn’t far away from the door. Literally on the other side of the wall was him. So he opens the door and sees my naked fiance. He wasn’t knocking for long cuz I checked the damn camera. All just to put in smoke detectors. We didn’t have when we moved in here why do we need them now?!

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

Wanna know what I hate? A bitch that likes riding in peoples ass. Tf you mean “why did I break check you?” WHY TF WAS YOU LICKING MY GOOCH FROM THE BACK SO DAMN HARD?! Don’t be mad cuz I don’t like that on the road bullying shit ya’ll love doing so much. Fuck around and find out HOE!

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

I just so happened to look out my balcony window cuz my fiancé told me that they’re painting the apartments. Okay cool. THEY ARE LITERALLY LANDLORD SPECIAL’ING THE FUCKING BALCONIES BRO. Literally painting over chipped wood and (already been there) chipped paint. This is why America looks ghetto to the outside world bro. ATP I’ll just come outta pocket and get it fixed and bill you guys for it.

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

EEEEEYO! I think they got Jim Carrey ya’ll. Cuz who the fuck was that?! That wasn’t Jim. And don’t gimme that “Stunt Double” bullshit. Why would this man have a stunt double to claim his award for him?? No Celebrity in HISTORY has ever used a stunt double to claim an award. That’s not fucking Jim Carrey! #whereisjimcarrey #jimcarrey

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

Has anyone else noticed when they’re scrolling on TikTok and start watching a video, mid video it automatically scrolls to the next one? WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THAT?? If my FBI agent wanted to watch too, all he had to do was ask man! Got me scared and confused for no reason.

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

Ya know- kids don’t live life on the edge no more. They don’t know about forging their parents signatures on report cards. Lying “she just ain’t put the grades in yet”, knowing damn well you ain’t do the work lmao. Coming home and deleting the voicemail your school left about your behavior or missing assignments. Deleting everything off your phone when THAT parent wants to go through it. Stealing money from out ya mom’s purse for snacks at school. Youngins don’t live life on the edge like dat no more. Now it’s all gang violence, school shooters, let’s see who can get pregnant first and beating up teachers for taking ur vape. GET FUCKING REAL BRUH lmfao.

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

@Roblox lemme talk to ya real quick. I’m trying to play Climb Yomiko Tower- WHY DID YOU GIVE IT PERMISSION TO HAVE A SLAPPING HAND FOR ANY AND EVERYONE TO BUY?! No one can really enjoy the fun of the game without getting BITCH SLAPPED by some kid using its parents phone, TO PLAY THE FUCKING GAME! DONT even get me started on the fucking tasers. GET THAT SHIT OUT OF THERE- NEOW! Or better yet, do it to where we play with people our age. Not these kid ass TROLLS! #roblox #climbyomikotower

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

IS IT JUST ME OR HAS FORTNITE BEEN FUCKING US ALL??? Fully healed, legendary weapon, nothing but head shots…HOW THE ABSOLUTE FUCK DID I JUST DIE FROM A COMMON SHOT GUN FROM FAR RANGE EXPLAIN THAT SHIT TO ME @EpicGames HUH??!!

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

@TeamYouTube I have yes. I’ve done the whole 9 yards @YouTube but it’s still not here

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

I’m sorry- @YouTube come to the front please.
Why is my repeat button gone?? I like to sleep with music, sounds n shit. But now I can’t because my repeat button gone. I paid for no adds just for yall to take it away?! I call BS- put it back

[.•❥Panda @NotAnNPC0311]

Is we serious gang… don’t pmo