Not Jake Paulina

i black out 8 days a week

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

Knockin on your bitches front door to beat them cheeks. #GOON

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

Got invited to this sluts house for dinner and gave a mustache ride to this broad and her mom with a fat ass. I fuckin stay slayin hoes

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

Happy 4th to all my hoes who have ridden the Italian Stallion... cheers

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

Fe fi fo fum Im gonna put it up ur girls bum

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

Let this good looking babe color in my faded back tat with a black crayon and then proceeded to beat the cheeks off her while she called me Pablo

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

I wonder who gets fucked more, me or my sister?

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

slept well last night

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

ladies call me subway bc I got low quality meat and lie about being 6 inches

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

I like my prostitutes how I like my rims, blacked out and paid for by my grandma.

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

My sister might talk like me but she can't drink like me

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

Was hanging with this chick with a fat ass and tried thinking of a way to smash, went and put on my scopes shorts and that sealed the deal

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

Just bought a pocket pussy half off!!! Who would've thought the used section would be so helpful!

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

Just used my moms credit card to buy new Gucci flip flops!!!!!!! SwAg ThE fUcK oUt #culps

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

Was 45 minutes late to my 9am this morning bc I was fuckin my neighbors girlfriend. Fuck school.

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

Bout to eat your girls ass like....

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

Wearing my floaties and goggles to the gym tonight bc all the bitches get wet whenever I start doing curls. Hope I don't drown.

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

For every time my mom tells me to go to rehab equals one bottle of New Amsterdam that week. Swiping cards and being a lard.

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

happy Easter @LaHankinson thanks for the yeti cooler miss u

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

yeah my sisters been drinkin since she was 12 but I've been slammin bottles of new amsterdam and fuckin my babysitter at 8 years old #sWaG

[Not Jake Paulina @notflexasaurus_]

birthday cake isn't the only cake I'm gettin 2nite