god’s favorite mollusk

migos member

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

megan the stallion if she was a farmer be like i like a pig with a little bit of dirt

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

i am yet to watch a christmas movie that portrays any form of labor union for elves. propaganda is not in what we see but in what we don’t see

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

PSA do not use the urinal if you’re gonna fart bro 😭😭😭😭

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

evil father in law at dinner: we’ve had our disagreements in the past, but i’m happy to say i view you not only as a son, but as a friend.

“bucket of lava prank” i’ve planned for the past two months where i offer him a bucket seemingly filled with popcorn: *hot bubbling sounds*

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

do you think they got dsps accommodations at the buddhist temple for the adhd monks

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

@m0th3rsuperi0r caught his ass tripping. triptyching. they caught his ass

[Nadine @m0th3rsuperi0r]

I wish they showed someone’s elevation on find my iphone #realstalker

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

@m0th3rsuperi0r why is she kind of giving spotify fursona

[Nadine @m0th3rsuperi0r]

I just invented Žižek Ramaswamy

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

@m0th3rsuperi0r the quotes inside the quotes somehow make me more upset than this nauseating image

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

@m0th3rsuperi0r ringless activities 😭😭😭

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

me: finally a new space heater! no more chilly toes at night! 😊😊

the malevolent, all seeing eyeball:

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

@m0th3rsuperi0r when my therapist tells me to write stream of consciousness

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

@challsrunner a pipe dream…

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

@nicccccccok i do not have the brawn of a carpenter nor the brain of the judge but i do yearn to be loved and hold a tool

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

i don’t want to be a judge or a carpenter but i do want to be paid to hold a sexy little hammer

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

@m0th3rsuperi0r going once going twice SOLD

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

honey come get dinner i made your favorite! colorless rectangular prisms!

[Achilles @mralexthomas]

Lunch:

-unpasteurised parmigiana
-dates with butter, raw honey
-90% dark chocolate salt

This is how we do fast food.

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

@m0th3rsuperi0r

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

@challsrunner this one was out of your comfort zone and i appreciate that

[god’s favorite mollusk @notjackconnell]

@challsrunner happy to see you experimenting with the return
key