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Vent account

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Lol nvm just been broken up with. I don’t think people can actually like me I’m definitely not anyone’s type. I’m too much and I’m ugly and fat and not enough of a woman and I’m not good enough. I hate me so everyone else is okay to too. They’ll never hate me as much as I do tho.

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My boyfriend said he loved me today and my therapist said that he’s proud of me and my best friend said he’s glad that we met and are friends. WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING?? WHY ARE PEOPLE BEING NICE TO ME? WHAT THE FUCK IS MERCURY DOING? WHAT WITCH SHIT IS HAPPENING TO DO THIS??🤯

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FUVK THIS ACCOUNT!! I JUST GOT A HOT BOYFRIENDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!

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I wish I could lie so still that my atoms stop moving and I turn to dust. I know that’s not how science works but when I lie awake at night with that heavy feeling in my chest, I wish I could just crumble away like a beautiful old stone statue. Like something man-made and perfect

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I don’t know what I thought would happen on the one year anniversary of my suislide attempt but I didn’t expect that nothing would happen. That I would be home alone with no one. I don’t know why I expected anything else. It’s not like anyone ever wants to actually love me openly

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Nothing is more freeing than finally recognising how worthless and expendable you are and will always be. When I die I’ll be nothing more than a meal for the earth. How beautifully sad.

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Do you ever wish that you were a horrible human being so people would hate you rather than just not like you? I don’t know what is missing in me to make you feel indifferent about my existence but I wish I could fill voids with acid and let it take everyone down with me as I burn

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How do I tell the person who created me, carried for 9 months and has looked after all these years that I have only existed for the last 12 years out of obligation and not because I want to or will ever want to? How do I do that and not break her want to continue after I’m gone?

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Can we normalise having a fear of drunk people to the point where being around people you love is still terrifying and it not being mean that you’re scared because it’s a FEAR and fears are very IRRATIONAL?? I can’t help that I’m scared but you don’t have to make me the asshole??

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Don’t you just love being told by your parent what you’ve done isn’t “good enough” or is “disgusting behaviour” for minor things like not walking the dogs or putting a cleaning cloth in the wash with their clothes? It’s not like they act like they love you outside of this either.

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It’s a different type of reality check when you’re told by a counsellor that how you feel makes them sad. That they think it’s sad that I’m just “existing” and how it sounds like I’ve “lost my want for life”. They’re not *my* counsellor they just talk to me while on the waitlist.

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You message me all the time and you’re so nice to me. You make me smile and made me feel good about myself for a couple days. But of course, it’s only casual. You only talk to me to get pictures and so you can plan when you can fuck me. I wish I didn’t like you so much.

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It wouldn’t be so bad if I didn’t feel so useless all the fucking time. I’m not good at anything and I don’t enjoy anything. I just do stuff to pass the time but no one would ever want anything I create because all so shit. I’m so useless man. I hate this.

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Honestly wish I just didn’t feel so fucking lonely all the time I feel like I’m not that horrible yk. I have no one to talk to. My friends haven’t messaged me in months and I just feel so cold like there will never be any warmth in me like there’s just ice in my fucking veins man

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@zofiaIaiIa What book is this from? I can’t remember

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I know you have been having a hard time and need to vent every night but if we’re having a conversation stop cutting me off and stop ignoring me I know you need to get it off your chest but I’m trying to help and just talk to you and you make me feel worthless and unimportant

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So fucking sick of being everyone’s second choice I want to be my favourite person’s favourite and it’s not fair that I’m not allowed to be mad about the fact I’m not I know it’s not their fault but it still fucking hurts you’re my number one why am I always your number like six?

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I wish I had someone who loved me but then I have friends and family who do but not in the way I want which is so selfish and I always feel like a spoilt brat trying to ask for stuff from them because I don’t deserve it but I still want it but I tell myself I can’t have it anyway