àńëwłįår

I like to follow you because you're funny and make no sense

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

I wanna be called, Blankety Blank

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

I dont want technology anymore

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

Chris Tucker (while singing) is always in autotune

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

a parady of the song "In Those Jeans" called, "In My Shorts" (feat. Niki Minaj and Dean Martin)

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

i'm a man on a mission and that mission is to steal wrappers of oatmeal cream pies and save the planet

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

make me a happy man/lady and cook breakfast for children

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

pee. it's supposed to be pee

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

red is to stop sign as yellow is to ______

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

there are twos of everything in NY. Baseball, Basketball, Ben Stiller, etc.

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

I wonder how street signs came about and how they got famous and all

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

ey i'm new to this so take it easy on me there intranet

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

caught sbarro's just in time. hey there, throw your leftovers into my mouth

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

just pissed off a security guard in line at Sbarro

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

jfk only makes me sad and stuff because I want to go everywhere

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

fake twitter accounts make people laugh i'm sure

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

call me Ishmael the whale and listening to my noises on a big red boat

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

sometimes, dogs will yell back but I always retaliate with a snort

[àńëwłįår @nwlair]

I like to walk down roads and scream uncontrollably until people start to realize i'm a dog