Margurite Hauben

I am a dating coach for men.

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

I?m like a plasma grenade. Let me get on you and you are guaranteed to explode.

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

Is your name "swiffer"? 'Cause you just swept me off my feet.

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

I bought a new bed yesterday and it was so comfortable that this morning I couldn't get out of it!

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

I feel restless.

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

Internet Dating Software Automates #Match #POF #Jdate #Zoosk http://t.co/Vr7KSAhy

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

Please excuse my son from school yesterday, he has gangrene and cock itch.

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

Q. What's the difference between a lesbian and a Ritz cracker? A. Ones a snack cracker, and the others a crack snacker!

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

I just got a double boiler for a gift!

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

Trooper Sam Winters pulled over a young man in Banner County who explained, "Officer I have a hot date tonight in Scottsbluff, and if you...

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

I was late for work one day because I had let our dog out in the morning while preparing for work, and when I went to let her in, she had...

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

Don't believe the rumours you've heard... the Bubonic plague didn't affect my important organs.

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

I'm sorry I was late. I puked on myself on the way to work and had to go home and change.

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

Q. Why do women have arms? A. Have you any idea how long it would take to LICK a bathroom clean?

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

I am thinking about getting a Ford Focus 2.0 Coupe Cabriolet for a new car!

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

Sorry but I cant make it in today because I just don't FEEL like it!!!!!!

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

In a study of undergraduate college students, 98% of men and 44% of women reported having ever masturbated (Pinkerton, Bogart, Cecil, & A...

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm. Winston Churchill

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

I feel collected.

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

Automate Your Online Dating #Sofware #Match #Zoosk #POF #Jdate http://t.co/7dNFYvf4

[Margurite Hauben @nylarhetzel]

I got a koodoo for a pet!