NZ Tipster

Smashing out news, tips and inside scoops! Your NZ sports tipster-

[NZ Tipster @nztipper]

The low-down on tips, sports news and scoops. https://t.co/IAfZNkIpOE

[Matt Hall-Smith @MattHallSmith21]

Sitting here watching the Lions vs Wallabies and James Lowe, my childhood neighbour is starting for the Lions, while ’m drinking a cheap 12 pack at a mate’s house. Not sure where it all went wrong. @JamesLowe_03

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

SEPARATE RAINBOWS

“Nothing wrong with going to work, paying rent, and kissing girls at Ivy. But I don’t want to be lumped in with whatever’s going on over at the Greens, especially with that whacko “bussy boy. Ew.”

https://t.co/K8rSrPZxYc

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

SIMPLER TIMES

Green Party co-leader Chloe Swarbrick is wishing MP Benjamin Doyle had simply stolen thousands of dollars worth of clothing from a high end fashion store today.

https://t.co/IXktorq1XD

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

HOLISTIC HYPOCRISY

“I always say wellness is about balance,” she chirped, adjusting her ethically sourced linen two-piece. “And sometimes, balance means hoofing a questionable capsule from a guy named Damo at a festival.”

https://t.co/7fDRUxfwTm

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

WELCOME TO THE GUN SHOW

34-year-old Mike Flanders has always had an admiration for Olympic canoeist Lisa Carrington’s muscular arms.

https://t.co/kHEwp0ELHP

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

SOMEBODY THINK OF THE KIWIS

Queensland supporter Mark Hickey, 33, is sitting down with his second cup of coffee , preparing for the State of Origin decider at Suncorp Stadium. The game is scheduled to kick off at 10:05 PM NZ.

https://t.co/fbjGNbs2xn

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

PRIORITIES

All Blacks coach Scott “Razor” Robertson announced today that he would not be vying for selection in New Zealand’s breaking team this year, despite being one of the highest profile breakdancers this country has to offer.

https://t.co/v1KrSIRwZK

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

ECONOMIC OUTLOOK IS GOOD

With all the economic doom and gloom in New Zealand and the world right now, there is one part of society that is bucking the trend – New Zealand sports clubs.

https://t.co/ywJOJUlDWY

[Matt Hall-Smith @MattHallSmith21]

This article basically says. You’re not allowed to ask a 10-2 coach if he’s the right man for the job, at a media session the Crusaders organised/invited media to. Strangest take I’ve ever read on the Thomas Mead/ Penney thing. What should he have asked?

https://t.co/qSOs9qJ5rE

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

GOING OFF SCRIPT

1News reporter Thomas Mead wasn’t meaning to catch Crusaders coach Rob Penney off guard yesterday.

https://t.co/pYwUJCDGqy

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

THAT GUY

Prime Minister Christopher Luxon today shocked the nation by unveiling his ambitious plan to bring back the iconic SportsCafe, which he starred in, by the year 2030.

https://t.co/4YDbEejzMx

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

CANNOT BE THE REAL WORLD

Craig Chamberlain of Shirley, a suburb of Christchurch, is convinced that the things he is experiencing cannot really be part of reality.

https://t.co/KkPpGk1CS3

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

NEVER WRITE THEM OFF

The TAB, in its infinite wisdom, has bestowed odds of $1.47 on the Chiefs, leaving the defending champions with the less glamorous tag of $2.80 underdogs.

https://t.co/KdstofFq1t

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

ALMOST ADULTING

33-year-old Matt Johnson has found himself in a state of pure elation as he realised he wouldn’t have to beg, borrow, or steal access to his parents’ SkyGo account to watch the Blackcaps tonight.

https://t.co/ONo9TyERK1

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

CRICKET ROYALTY

A self-proclaimed cricket fanatic and low-level employee at the country’s Reserve Bank in Wellington, went rogue from his normal duties today, and decided to honour arguably New Zealand’s best ever cricketer Kane Williamson.

https://t.co/ow2ei1aYsi

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

NOTHING TO WEAR

Accused shoplifter Golriz Ghahraman, a 42 year old NZ Greens MP , is back in the country and just about ready to front the media.

“Have you actually seen how much things cost at Scotties Boutique? They’re the real criminals.” She said.

https://t.co/KSxaRkn9nw…

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

SOCIALISM WITH STYLE

Off the back of Golriz Ghahraman’s bold statement that people should not in fact have to pay for things, the Greens leadership have made a fresh new policy announcement.

https://t.co/Oy0djzHmQ5

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

NEWS FLASH

Golriz Ghahraman, a prominent Green Party MP and human rights lawyer, has found herself entangled in a scandal that has left her both annoyed and baffled.

https://t.co/dWCXSUft6Y

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

IT'S NOT A BRIBE

New Zealand’s media has had an absolute gutsful of our new deputy prime minister Winston Peters. From the moment the combative politician regained his position in government, he has been on the attack.

https://t.co/GVvXENPhsx

[The Whakataki Times @WhakatakiTimes]

FORBIDDEN LUST

Smug millennial Ruby Wareing is likely never going to know what it is like to have a full head of steam before 10 am on the second Tuesday of November.

https://t.co/ze0veGkQdG