oatmeal enthusiast

a pleasure to have in class

[oatmeal enthusiast @oatconsumer]

[Google Maps voice]: welcome to New Hampshire

[Spooky Amber Nicole 🎃🖤 @ambular_93]

Not to brag but I’m not scared of ANY American Girl dolls

[Terri Schuester Updates @terri_updates]

Wait does this mean I might finally have some actual Terri Schuester updates

[🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸PALEOLITHIC AGE TUNA 🐟ALTUNA🐟 ALTINA @alt1na1]

regardless of the sleep deprivation & chemical reasons, postpartum depression is the most reasonable thing in the world. ur fat, in pain, ugly, ur body is broken, u don’t get hobbies 2 work on or accomplishments 2 measure or anything like that really. & all the while every day that passes ur beautiful perfect baby gets a little bit older & a little bit bigger. & after every beautiful transcendent moment of shocking glory big baby beauty, u see a flash of how fragile we all are & how fast life goes. & there’s nothing 2 distract u from the despair!!! ur forced 2 contemplate life & death all day long in ur stupid underpants!!!!!!!!

[abby🕊️REST IN PEACE PAC🍉 @abbywillwrite]

you’re laughing? will schuester is about to sing moonbeam ice cream and you’re laughing?

[oatmeal enthusiast @oatconsumer]

the people at the baby sock factory when they get their hands on that little plastic barb gun:

[oatmeal enthusiast @oatconsumer]

Ducks floating in the pond, etc etc etc

[oatmeal enthusiast @oatconsumer]

Just saw a squirrel at the park eating an acorn. Classic stuff, really love to see it

[Jake @JakeWally]

Katie Zacharia a very Trump 1 character. We needed that

[habitual line-stepper @alaskastardust]

walked past a bar and they got How It’s Made on the tv. They got me. Floated on up there like a cartoon character sniffing a pie on a windowsill

[sara @girmafoxy]

let’s go ahead and suit up ❤️

[Y @scullystarbuckk]

happy mulder day to everyone who celebrates

[Teddy Blank @teddypowday]

Sometimes I don’t mind cleaning up the baby’s block puzzles because then I get to do a little puzzle. It’s my turn to put the sheep where the sheep goes

[jill ꕤ @alikriegys]

you are so deeply missed

[leah @kmewisfc]

just got sad about sam mewis again she truly was robbed of what could’ve been a generational career

[april 🔆🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ @gaypril_906]

vince gilligan's second ever x-files episode was about a man dying of cancer who refused treatment and instead became a violent murderer because it made him feel stronger in his insecure masculinity. i wonder if he ever wrote something like that again after the x-files

[one dozen bats at a keyboard @PanasonicDX4500]

the Catholic Church racking up PR wins by saying shit like “we shouldn’t bring back public executions” and “your Claude app isn’t sentient”

[wendy gunk @splorg8]

youre not even done being green yet how are you brown. fuck you dude seriously

[Payton Tolle Enjoyer @AnonTwitt3rUser]

Me liking every tweet about the Yankees elimination